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Topic why a child screams before going to bed. A child cries a lot before going to bed: possible reasons, how to help

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Sleep disturbances in children, especially newborns, are a common problem. Such “insomnia” is accompanied by loud crying. There are many reasons for it: from unwillingness to sleep to pain in an inflamed ear. And to understand why a child cries before bed or during sleep, you need to find out and try to eliminate them.

The nature of crying

An infant is extremely limited in its ability to convey information. Move his legs and arms, shake his head and scream - these are all the means at his disposal. With such a limited choice, maximum meaning is invested in each such signal.

Crying is a communication of discomfort of any kind or kind. Excess of impressions and pain in the tummy, reaction to the loud dissatisfied voice of the mother and fear in her absence - everything is communicated through loud, heartbreaking screams.

Crying is not always a sign of distress or a shortcoming. On the contrary, loud sounds indicate sufficient nutrition and health: sick and weakened children whine and cry quietly. The reason for the increased “loudness” is evolutionary in nature: the baby is a completely defenseless creature, and in order to survive, it must attract the attention of the mother, wherever she is.

The physiological basis of crying is stress relief. Discomfort, hunger, pain, strong emotion cause tension. To get rid of it, the baby must either satisfy the desire - to get milk, for example, or relieve this tension physical activity. Screams and energetic movements of arms and legs - the first a way of relieving stress that a person learns.

And therefore current opinion: the child needs to cry in order to calm down, has a basis.

How and why do babies cry?

Despite the fact that the baby has the same signal for all occasions, its characteristics are different. And if a tentative “calling” cry is not always worth paying attention to, a pitiful or angry cry serves as a very specific message.

  • Hungry crying is more often heard in the morning, but only if the baby is already accustomed to the change of day and night. In the first two months of life, a newborn does not distinguish the time of day and can sleep well during the day and demand food and attention at night. An equally common cause is insufficient dinner: the baby cries in his sleep, wakes up from hunger and requires additional feeding.

Hungry crying begins as a whimper, a statement of discomfort, and quickly turns into an angry cry. At the same time, the child shakes his head, looking for the breast or bottle.

  • The same intonations are observed in the demand to change wet diapers or diapers. Even in a dream, the child feels discomfort, wakes up and shouts about his plight. In both cases they act the same way: they immediately satisfy the desire of the newborn. After which the baby calmly falls asleep.
  • It is much worse when a child cries pitifully, continuously, while his body is tense, his fists are clenched, and the movements of his legs are sharp. This means that the baby is in pain. We are no longer talking about any sleep here; all efforts should be directed toward identifying the source of pain and removing it.

Most common reason– colic, and, unfortunately, practically irreparable. Colic is caused by intestinal dysfunction, and the reason for the latter is adaptation difficulties digestive tract baby to regular food. Pain is relieved light massage tummy, taking special drops, dill water.

Gases also cause discomfort: when sucking, air enters the stomach, and once in the intestines, it causes spasms. To avoid this, after feeding you need to hold the baby in an upright position for a couple of minutes.

  • Invitational crying - the child’s dependence on the mother is almost absolute. Her presence for the newborn is the only guarantee of safety that he knows, therefore, waking up at night and not finding his parent nearby, the baby will definitely call for his mother.

The calling cry consists of several phases: first, not very loud for 5-6 seconds, waiting, a longer repeated cry, survival again, and then an angry loud cry from the bottom of my heart. The baby should receive the mother's attention on demand: he is still too small and weak. But an older child can already use crying as leverage.

Crying before bed

If colic and inflammation or other physical reasons pain, then crying before bed can be the very calming ritual mentioned above.

  • Fatigue - even an adult, experiencing extreme fatigue, may lose sleep and peace, let alone the baby. Therefore, before going to bed, they try to play calm games with the child, gradually setting him up in a calming mood. A walk in the fresh air, at least on the balcony, also helps both children and adults.
  • Overexcitement is another common answer to the question of why a child cries before bed. An excess of impressions can keep a child in emotional tension longer than an adult. Screaming and crying are an accessible way for him to relieve stress. It is necessary to calm the baby, but not so much with the goal of making him fall asleep, but rather with developing a ritual of consolation. Later, a simple stroke on the back and a lullaby sung in a whisper will be enough for the baby to react in the usual way and fall asleep peacefully at night.

The same actions before bedtime, and sleep at the same time, have a strong calming effect and develop a habit in the baby.

  • Teeth – their appearance may still be a long way off, but the gums begin to itch and itch much earlier. Before bed, this itching causes the greatest irritation, and a tired child reacts by crying. Soothing ointments help.

Crying in a dream

The sleep period of a newborn is very short - up to 90 minutes. During the first 8 weeks it increases to several hours, and compliance with the daily regimen is developed no earlier than after 2–3 months.

  • All this time, the baby often wakes up at night and cries if he does not find the usual “daytime” entertainment - mother, mother’s milk, the usual daytime sounds and the opportunity to take a walk. You cannot change any of this.
  • At night the baby wakes up from pain, just like during the day: diseases do not recognize the time of day. Teething contributes to children's insomnia starting from the age of three months. Even in a dream, the baby feels irritated and wakes up.
  • From four months the baby begins to dream. For children, sleep is a serious unsolvable mystery, since until the age of 4 they do not distinguish between what happened in a dream and what happened in reality. The baby wakes up, but the moment of awakening is not recorded in his mind. And if in a dream he felt fear or anxiety, then, upon waking up, he continues to be tormented by emotions. And, of course, she cries.

Such crying cannot be ignored educational purposes, such as, for example, conscription, since for the baby the appearance of the mother serves as one of the markers of reality.

Crying as a method of pressure

The newborn, responding with cries and movements to the influence of the environment, reacts directly.

The newborn, responding with cries and movements to the influence of the environment, reacts directly. However, by the age of 3–4 months, children develop quite definite behavioral reactions. One of them is the demand for immediate attention using a loud, annoying cry. His intonation is far from pitiful or hungry, and usually mothers themselves can hear perfectly well that the baby is capricious.

It is difficult to say at what point educational work to eradicate the habit should begin: it depends on the fortitude of the mother herself, the child’s temperament and the patience of the rest of the household. A baby can scream for a long time and selflessly, and it can be very difficult to explain your reluctance to pay attention to the baby.

This usually concerns the time before bedtime: at night the child wakes up and cries for more “valid” reasons, and crying in his sleep does not depend on him.

Crying is a natural and normal reaction of a baby both to the environment and to his own condition. You should not treat it as a negative phenomenon that must be stopped immediately by any means. With the help of all his actions, including screams, the child practices ways of interacting with people and influencing them.

A child’s restful sleep pleases parents, allowing them to fully relax and go about their business. However, sometimes going to bed in children is accompanied by prolonged falling asleep, painful screams and strong tantrums. The child screams before going to bed, seemingly without any reason, it is impossible to calm him down. Child hysteria is understood as a state of excessive emotional arousal of a child, manifested by loud screams, crying, aggressive and inappropriate behavior. Particularly severe cases of hysteria can result in convulsions. However, for the most part, children's tantrums are the norm and are easily explained. Why does a child scream before going to bed? Knowing the nature and causes, you can prevent and prevent hysteria, and also understand whether you should seek help from a specialist.

A child is born with not yet fully formed systems and organs. Thus, children develop the skill of distinguishing day from night only a month and a half after birth.

Infants have a different sleep structure from adults, with short and rapidly changing phases:

  • An adult's sleep has 4 phases;
  • In a child, the third phase is formed by the first year of life.

The baby's sleep begins with superficial or fast phase when the nervous system and brain are actively working, digesting information received in large quantities per day. Also during this period, muscle activity is observed that can frighten and wake up the child. Transitioning from one phase to another can also cause your baby to scream and cry in the middle of the night.

In children under 4 years of age, the nervous system is designed in such a way that excitation processes dominate over inhibition processes. The exception is 10-15% of children who can feel overexcited and cope with it.

Here are examples:

  1. Only little phlegmatic people can fall asleep on their own without the help of their parents.
  2. Choleric children painfully fall asleep due to excessive excitement characteristic of this type of temperament.
  3. Sanguine people have a large supply of energy, which allows them not to get tired for a long time and interferes with the process of falling asleep.

The developmental characteristics of a child allow him to begin to independently cope with overexcitation only by 3.5 years, and in practice, six months later. Until this age, it is easy for a child to become overexcited and requires a lot of work to calm down. For this reason, children scream and cry, especially before bed, when they need to relax.

Our ancestors were not afraid baby crying. In their arsenal in case a child is hysterical before bed, there were lullabies and fairy tales, as well as various nursery rhymes to distract and calm an overexcited child.

Overwork overtakes the baby quickly and imperceptibly: one minute he was playing, and the next minute he can no longer control himself, screaming and crying like a knife. Parents are perplexed by such sharp changes moods and cannot understand the reasons.

Being able to notice the signs of approaching fatigue in time is a complex behavioral skill that not all adults have, and in children it is formed only by the age of 4.

Increased excitability is far from the only cause of children's tantrums before bed.

Along with overexcitation there are some psychological factors that prevent your child from falling asleep peacefully:

Children under 2 years of age cannot clearly articulate why they cannot sleep. Therefore, they often throw tantrums and cry before going to bed. This is the only way in their arsenal so far to show that something is bothering them.

Reasons for contacting a psychotherapist or psychologist may include: following cases:

  • if a child over 10 years old is afraid to sleep alone without light, talking about fantastic creatures hiding in his room (schoolchildren already perfectly distinguish between the boundaries of fiction and truth);
  • if a child throws tantrums before bed, afraid to fall asleep, screams loudly and cries bitterly in his sleep, talks about death;
  • if the child shows signs panic attack: uneven breathing, loss of consciousness and more.

Even in the absence of these signs, parents should not ignore children's fears and worries. A common fear of the dark in a small family member without taking appropriate measures can lead to mental and nervous disorders. Children's fears, hidden deep in the subconscious, can be the cause of uncertainty and complexes in adulthood.

The child grows and develops, changes occur in the body, sometimes causing discomfort.

The following are noted physiological factors, making a child cry and scream before bedtime:

Screaming and crying small child may be the reason pain syndrome or availability hidden disease. When a child regularly has difficulty falling asleep, sleeps restlessly, looks tired and loses appetite, it is necessary to seek help from a doctor as soon as possible.

Most best way fighting children's hysteria is its warning.

Some simple tips will help you develop the skill of observing your child, promptly recognizing an impending hysteria and taking measures to prevent it:

  1. It is not overwork, but good fatigue that allows you to fall asleep calmly and quickly. City children are often prone to night hysterics, especially in the autumn-winter period. They are unable to spend sufficient quantity physical strength to get tired. The fatigue they get from watching TV, running around the house and playing with toys that bore them is not enough to proper development And good sleep. Children need muscle activity and a moderate amount of new experiences: morning exercises, walks at any time of the year, active games outdoors, communication with peers, classes in sports sections and studios.
  2. One of the main tasks of parents is to control the level of arousal of the child. The baby should not be bored, but impressions (visual, auditory, motor, social) should be strictly dosed. Each child has his own measure of impressions that are beneficial to health. The problem is that a child under 4-5 years old cannot feel it on his own. This is where the parent comes in, who should intuitively feel and see this line. Attentive parents can silently identify changes in their child's behavior that indicate that he is close to overexcitement and fatigue. One begins to laugh loudly, another begins to whine, a third begins to move faster, falling and hitting objects, and for a fourth, the tempo of speech and the volume of their voice change. You need to know these “bells” well, notice them in a timely manner and take action without waiting for the child to become hysterical.
  3. To accustom your baby to the waking and sleeping patterns, you need to actively communicate with him during the day, not create the illusion of night with closed curtains, and not maintain complete silence during his daytime sleep. Parents can talk to each other, do something around the house, listen to music quietly or watch TV. However, you should avoid sharp and loud sounds that can wake up and frighten the baby. At night, on the contrary, it is necessary to exclude bright light, gradually teaching the baby to fall asleep in complete darkness. 2 hours before going to bed, you should set your child up for rest and relaxation, avoiding emotional stress, active games and loud laughter.
  4. Co-sleeping with a baby has two sides of its manifestation. On the one hand, the baby is comfortable and calm next to his mother, and the mother has the opportunity, without getting up, to quickly put the baby to bed in the middle of the night while breastfeeding. The other side is not so pleasant - the baby’s sleep is restless, with shudders and sobs, especially if it was preceded by hysteria, disturbs the mother during the night and does not allow her to fully rest. How longer baby will be in his parents' bed, the more difficult it will be to wean him from this habit without hysterics. It is better to immediately accustom the child to his crib, and in the future, if possible, allocate him a room or a small corner in the apartment. Personal space creates good self-esteem, feeling self-esteem and importance for the child.
  5. It is important for a calm and timely fall asleep to follow certain rules, a kind of ritual that sets the child up for sleep. Children willingly perform traditional, familiar and familiar actions. First, you need to decide on a clear bedtime and prepare for it in advance together with your baby. You can collect the toys and wish them good night, then go into a warm bath with a relaxing infusion of herbs or essential oils and wish the toys in the bathtub good dreams. Reading a book, watching a program " Good night, kids!”, massage with a drop aromatic oil, singing a lullaby with rocking in your arms and much more, which is dear to parents from childhood and finds a positive response from the child. It is useful to quietly talk with your baby before bed about how he spent the day, about his interests, impressions and friends. Warm hugs and conversations before bed, at least 15 minutes, are calming nervous system child, improve falling asleep and normalize his sleep. However, in order to avoid emotional arousal and, as a result, prolonged falling asleep, these rituals must be clearly limited in time. After the ritual of going to bed, you should put the baby in his bed and wish him good night.

If a child resists and cries, this indicates that he has formed incorrect associations about sleep. In this case, you need to patiently and firmly follow the established rules, without giving in to the child’s resistance or requests. You should not follow the child’s lead, pick him up, endlessly rock him to sleep and sing lullabies. It is much better to calmly explain that it is time to sleep, sit next to the crib, and pet the baby. It is important to remember that the child needs to grow up, and the process of rocking oneself in one’s arms delays this moment.

Daytime sleep is necessary for a child to relax, restore strength and relieve stress. Many children resist and refuse to sleep during the day. If parents cannot resist the pressure of their child, negative consequences in the form of overexcitement and nightly hysterics will not take long to appear, and it will be difficult to return to the previous daily routine.

Experts believe that children need daytime rest before starting school.

Particularly excitable and emotional first-graders, under the influence of a new environment and stress, will need daytime sleep. According to general standards daily allowance baby sleep, recommended by pediatricians, a child from 6 to 12 months needs two daily sleep periods of 1 hour and 20 minutes. Children 1.5-3 years old need a daytime rest of at least 1.5 hours to feel comfortable.

Norms child development They say that by the age of two, a child should be able to fall asleep on his own. By this age, many enroll children in kindergartens, where the ability to fall asleep calmly and without the help of adults is an important point. Sleep habits and associations are difficult to change. However, there are moments at the child’s age when this is easiest to do: up to 6 months, at the time of weaning from breastfeeding, at the time the child begins to communicate in phrases. The task of parents is not to miss these moments and use them to normalize the right habits that will be relevant for a child up to 7-8 years old.

It is important to know if the baby has no deviations in physical and mental development, then the reasons for his hysterics lie in family relationships, difficulties of socialization and incorrect assessment of the baby’s behavior. It is important to understand the causes of children's tantrums, prevent them and help the child by guiding and correcting his behavior. This painstaking and long work requires a lot of patience and consistency from parents.

Joint efforts, search for compromises, perseverance and love of parents will save the child from hysterics before bedtime and make his childhood happy and joyful.

    gali4ka 25/11/2010 at 15:21:55

    The child cries before every sleep, what should I do?

    Girls, my daughter is 3.5 months old, before every sleep she screams terribly, it doesn’t matter when you go to bed, during the day or at night, whether you put her to bed earlier, later, on your chest, with a pacifier - she squeals every sleep, she turns blue:(((Sleep she wants to, but she screams. It feels like she is very excited, she wants to sleep, but she can’t fall asleep. The only way to put her to sleep is to wrap her in a diaper (otherwise she bends all over while crying), and jump with her on a fitball.
    I no longer have the strength, every time I put the child to bed is a concert program, and he sleeps restlessly and wakes up often. It happens that you put her to bed, and after 15 minutes she wakes up, and half an hour later she whines to sleep again, I put her to bed again, and again there is a scream in the house.
    Two neurologists said that the child was completely healthy, one NSG showed that things were not very good, the other - that everything was perfect.
    I don’t know what to do anymore, I’m already afraid of putting the baby to bed, in 3.5 months she only fell asleep peacefully three times, practically without screaming. I'm slowly losing my nerves :(

    • Ancka 25/11/2010 at 15:49:25

      We had this too, but for a period of time, now it’s switched off

      at night on her own, even without motion sickness. And this period, also at 3.5 months, we simply rocked harder and longer through the screaming. Then this happened again when we did massages before the bath and night sleep. The massages stopped and my sleep improved. I think it's some kind of overexcitement.

      • Diana_74 25/11/2010 at 16:32:11

        For us, this started at 4 months and continues to this day (and we recently turned 8 months). Nothing hurts 100%, but as soon as you pick it up with the thought of putting it to bed, it’s a concert. Sometimes terrible hysterics, sometimes just blathering. But we don’t go to bed without it. It manifests itself especially strongly in the evening before going to bed at night. The explanation is simple - I want to sleep, but I can’t fall asleep. The child is excitable and cannot relax in any other way; he relieves tension by yelling. I’m already philosophical about this. The main thing for us is to prevent hysteria with redness and blueness, etc. I hold it in my arms, calmly press it to me and calmly, not paying attention to the yelling, sing lullabies. lately- 10 min. and allows...Hold on, perceive this as a peculiarity of your child. I would not practice swaddling and jumping on a fitball, because... in this case, mechanical motion sickness occurs, which is not beneficial for the baby...

        • gali4ka 25/11/2010 at 17:02:04

          Yes, I read from Komarovsky,

          that the baby rocks from rocking, but in these three and a half months I have already tried everything, the only thing that helps is jumping, then she seems to calm down, listens and then forgets that she needs to yell. :((

          • Lyuda_Nikolaychuk 11/26/2010 at 13:21:51

            we had a similar situation

            After 5 months of starting to sleep better, and the sleep process has started, then calm down yourself, pat the baby on the back, purr a song, lie down, get the child to sleep, because if you are running around, then you will know that it’s time for the child sleep and you begin to get nervous and shake the baby " there won't be any. Good luck and patience

      • suboba_1 11/25/2010 at 21:48:48

      try the sound of tap water instead of a fitball, it helped us to distract and relax even with colic

      • gali4ka 25/11/2010 at 21:51:41

        I haven’t tried the water, I turned on the hairdryer, but it quiets down for a minute, then I turn off the hairdryer,

        and she starts screaming again. Let's try the water too, thanks

        • Irenna 11/26/2010 at 11:22:12

          1 for water

          tummy towards you, weak light from the bathroom into the dark corridor, pump up. The sling also helped.

      OlgaP 26/11/2010 at 21:48:32

      we are also 3.5

      how many times a day do you sleep? for example, we sleep at 9 am for about 40 minutes, then at lunch on the street from 1 pm to 3 pm and in the evening for about 30-40 minutes around six pm. And that’s all...
      at night we go to bed screaming at about 11, just like you on the fitball, during the night we get up 4 times to refresh ourselves and at 7 in the morning we are ready like a cucumber for a new day... Maybe she just needs less sleep.... If, for example, we are put to bed at every feeding - there will be no less screaming than yours....

      • gali4ka 11/28/2010 at 11:05:09

        we get more:

        it used to be like this:

        first nap at 9-10 am 40 minutes
        second nap around 1 p.m. for an hour or two, depending
        then around 4:30-5 pm, also an hour or two, depending on how - if you haven’t slept before, you’ll sleep longer
        then at 7 pm sleep for 30-40 minutes.
        then we go swimming at 8 pm somewhere.
        then at 9-10 I put her to bed for the night. Sometimes, if I put her to bed at 9, then at 11 she wakes up to eat, and then depending on her luck, sometimes she eats and falls asleep, sometimes she plays for another hour.
        At night he wakes up in different ways, on average 4 times, this is without hanging from the side.
        We get up at 7:30, together with dad, who is getting ready for work (she sleeps very lightly, so she wakes up).

        BUT I write this ideally, it very often happens that she wants to sleep, yawns, rubs her eyes, I put her to bed. she falls asleep, after 15 minutes she wakes up again, I try to pump her up - no, she wants to play, she’s cheerful, her eyes are shining, we’re playing, but... she didn’t get enough sleep earlier - then she wants to sleep again, again she starts whining, rubbing her eyes, yawning, then she can put her to bed again, because... cries in her arms.
        The little one falls asleep again. and then you’ll be lucky - either you’ll get some sleep, or you’ll get up quickly and start whining again.

        I tried to exhaust her so that she would be more tired and sleep longer, not letting her sleep, but it turned out even worse, because... if she wants to sleep, she whines and whines, then it’s harder to calm her down, but when I put her to bed, she sleeps little.
        In general, I'm waiting for it to outgrow.

        Now I’ve started to play with her calmly, don’t let her get overexcited around bedtime, no loud musical toys, no kicking and flying))) and I carry her in my arms around the house, show her things that aren’t bright, I calmly say - she seems to have started yelling less. Thu thu thu

      Snovapuz 08/12/2010 at 23:01:56

      Galyun, you and I are like twins

      More precisely kids. The same thing started happening to my son. For a couple of days now, though (not since birth). He eats, and after eating he starts screaming, the whole family calms him down. I can imagine how it feels for you. I almost turned gray in a couple of days and was already thinking about a bottle so as not to mock the child. I also rocked it on a fitball until it burst ;))))
      Our NSG is just not very good. Maybe you should see another doctor? They have already given me two very good coordinates.
      But my friend said another reason. I quote: “I had Anfys like that, when she saw her breasts she was literally hysterical. I wish I had found out sooner. It turns out that her stomach sphincter did not contract well and after eating the milk rose again, that is, like heartburn, and this is uncomfortable and painful for babies. This is where the crying and refusal to breastfeed came from. She ate calmly only at night, in her sleep. It’s a pity that they only figured this out when she completely refused to breastfeed. They found out after an ultrasound of the stomach with water loading. It’s clearly visible how the child drinks. , and the water flows back: (Talk to a gastroenterologist, maybe he can help solve this problem?)
      +I’ll also add, I completely forgot - after eating, don’t immediately put it horizontally, ideally let it lie on an inclined plane, the doctor advised us, at 45 degrees.
      And I also thought - maybe I just get tired of sucking, like Vladimir with a tongue tie? And the upper one too, well, where is the upper lip connected to the jaw (inside)? It happens that this little thing interferes with eating :(

      • gali4ka 09/12/2010 at 12:15:10

        hmm, I don’t know, I’ll keep an eye on her... Thanks for the idea...

        We've been to the NSG twice already.
        The fact is that I have it even more or less, it seems to me that she is simply overexcited, because... I have a daughter - well, pure whack, very nimble and restless

      momKatya 11/27/2010 at 10:27:26

      usually it goes away on its own, carry it in your arms, talk gently, rock it

      • gali4ka 11/28/2010 at 11:09:02

        and when it passes, can you tell me?

        • momKatya 11/28/2010 at 23:38:52

          I remember our last screams for no reason for about 6 months, but then they were dedicated to moving to the dacha.

          Gradually, you will cry less and less often. and then it will stop)))
          and would not take any action, especially medication.
          Just be with the child, try not to get irritated. I developed complete calm in myself with such crying, she screamed in my ear, and how it passed through me.

      asmar 25/11/2010 at 15:30:02

      Gal, our reasons for yelling are as follows: I want to sleep, I can’t sleep, I want to eat, or something hurts

      If you rule out pain and want to eat, then all that remains is that I want to sleep, but I can’t. Are you overheating her emotionally? TV, music, massages, swimming, active communication???????? Maybe there is something that makes her very overstimulated? Our child can go a maximum of 3 hours without sleep, then whims, then yelling. I try to adjust my daily routine so that I alternate everything constantly, so as to prevent screaming

      • asmar 25/11/2010 at 15:31:52

        we were also advised neuroheel - this is homeopathy

        Most likely, such a child’s anxiety is not good, if nothing bothers the child, he should not scream, although, all children are different.

        • gali4ka 25/11/2010 at 17:04:11

          Len, they assigned me a minor

          I bought Doromkind (the same company that produces Enterokind), but my hand doesn’t rise to give it to a small one, I don’t want to stuff such a small one with pills :(

          • asmar 25/11/2010 at 17:27:01

            I know that mothers also practice soothing teas

            I just don’t know what age they are. She was prescribed neuroheel, although the little one is more or less calm, but I’m still wondering whether to buy it or not. So I understand you. But if I had yelled as much as you write, I would most likely have given up.

      sdandy 08/12/2010 at 18:52:57

      by the time you go to bed, the child is already overtired

      try to go to bed earlier than you think it’s time :) look at the child, he becomes thoughtful, rubs his eyes - it’s time, miss it a little - overwork and, as a result, overexcitement. This happened to us when we bathed the child before bed according to Komarovsky. She was very tired, overexcited and walked until 12-2 at night, and she herself was a morning person, so she always got up at 7-8 in the morning and did not get enough sleep during the night. then she couldn’t sleep during the day, because she wasn’t rested, and then the day’s events piled on her, she was terribly hysterical before going to bed, and so on for any reason. We changed the regime and moved the bathing to the morning. A child under one year old should sleep 10-11 hours at night, during the day from 0 to 6 months 3 times a day for a total of 5-6 hours, 6 months - 1-2 times a day for a total of 4-5 hours. And almost all children are initially early risers, so night sleep they usually go to bed at 7-8-9 pm maximum. In Komarov style, we first held the child until he went to bed... it’s terrible. Now we put the little one to bed according to her schedule and not ours. Because 7-8 hours at night are enough for us, but she needs 10-12 to rest properly

      • gali4ka 08/12/2010 at 18:57:51

        Very likely... we'll try it, thanks.

        gali4ka 08/12/2010 at 22:17:58

        I see you understand children’s dreams very well, but maybe tell me what to do if

        the child wakes up every 25-40 minutes, not always, but during the day almost all the time, I read that children sleep in a cycle of 40 minutes, so at the end of virtually every cycle my daughter wakes up :(

      SunLight 25/11/2010 at 17:14:06

      This often happens to little ones - they otherwise cannot cope with emotions and sensations during the waking period.

      If there are no questions regarding neurology, then it will outgrow quite quickly.
      Before going to bed, exclude loud noises, exercises, fun...

      vinny_79 25/11/2010 at 17:34:05

      And it happened to us, it’s slowly passing (we’re 8.5 months old now).

      I also connect this with my nervous tension - I’m very afraid of this scream, and every time before rocking I just freeze with fear that it’s about to start... And then I hired a nanny, who obviously isn’t afraid of this, and the child started slowly fall asleep peacefully.

      • asmar 25/11/2010 at 19:23:56

        100% there is something in this, I also noticed as soon as I let go of the situation

        how a child changes before your eyes. Children are very sensitive to their mother’s condition, and this is the result. Gal, maybe you need to look within yourself for the reason? let go of all fears, look and the situation with screams will subside

        • gali4ka 25/11/2010 at 19:31:38

          During all this time I have already tried a lot. At first I thought,

          that this is how it should be, that this is normal. What about time will pass. But it doesn’t go away, and even gets worse :(

          • vinny_79 25/11/2010 at 20:02:21

            And for us it grew from 3.5 to 7 months,

            but believe me, children grow up and stop screaming so much, if only because they start playing, crawling, sitting, standing up, etc., they get very tired and sometimes they simply pass out from fatigue. Get over it, I also thought about visiting all the doctors, and it seemed to me that something was wrong with the child.

      Nataly_N 25/11/2010 at 15:48:41

      I want to reassure you

      I want to reassure you. I had this with my eldest (she is now 6 years old), it also started at 3-3.5 months. And I, just like you, didn’t know what to do. delivered her at 5 months. I then chalked it all up to teeth (they came out at 4 months and 5 months).

      When the youngest was born, everything was super until 3.5 months - she fell asleep at the breast. And then again at 3.5 months the screams began before bed, and I knew for sure that she was not hungry and her tummy was unlikely to bother her. And just like with the older one, everything went away on its own in 5-5.5 months (and the teeth came out already at 6 months). Now she is 6.5 months old, she falls asleep next to me at night, and in my arms during the day.

      So I came to the conclusion that children just need to outgrow this, they just want to sleep, they get tired, but they can’t sleep.

      I only wish you patience, I think that everything will be settled for you by 5-5.5 months.

      • gali4ka 25/11/2010 at 17:00:40

        The fact is that we have it since birth! Every single day it’s the same thing:(I hope it really grows out of it:(

      oleshenka 09/12/2010 at 12:31:53

      I'm trying to stick my breasts in

      if it doesn’t work out very well, then a bottle of expressed milk. He drinks the bottle quickly, then he gets tired and may pass out. And the chest - before going to bed, lying in bed, wets it a couple of times and falls asleep. Both are good, only if the child is hungry, he will wake up immediately. That's why I give breastfeeding first and then another bottle.... Maybe someone will throw slippers at me, but for me this is the way out. He begins to fall asleep on his chest or even scream. But I only do this at night.
      A bridle is also an option, check it out.

      alsid2003 11/26/2010 at 10:24:50

      We have the same story

      it all started at 2 months, when she starts crying, we get dressed and go outside, she calms down on the street and falls asleep, we walk for another five minutes and return home, it helps one hundred percent, night walks also happen, but the terrible yelling and crying have become less frequent, We are now three months old.

      • Diana_74 26/11/2010 at 13:04:32

        Tick, I’ll add: 100% no need to think about

Lyudmila Sergeevna Sokolova

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According to statistics, approximately 30% of children under one year of age experience sleep disturbances. This is expressed in difficulty falling asleep, frequent waking up, crying during, before and after sleep. Why does a child cry before going to bed? There can be many reasons, but parents should act depending on the specific reason. If you do not take any measures, hoping that crying before bed is associated with age and the child will simply outgrow all this, then later the baby may develop serious problems not only with sleep, but also with mental state.

The nature of baby crying

Babies do not know how to talk, so they can only convey any information to an adult by crying. Children scream and cry when they experience any discomfort that is not necessarily related to their well-being. The reason for crying can be loud annoying sounds, emotional overexcitement, protest due to falling into the wrong hands, fear due to the fact that the mother has gone somewhere.

Based on the strength and volume of a child’s crying, doctors can draw conclusions about his well-being. A sick and weak newborn cries quietly and pitifully. A loud, demanding cry that attracts attention speaks of good health and nutrition.

If the reason for crying is a physical need (for example, for food and warmth), then it stops after this need is satisfied (after gaining access to milk, warming up). If the reason is emotional overexcitability, then the baby will calm down only after he throws out his tension - he cries, screams, and actively waves his arms and legs. This way he will get rid of stress.

Features of children's sleep

Sleep is extremely important for every person, and even more so for a growing baby. This is the best way to restore the strength spent during waking hours. During the process of sleep, the child grows, develops and strengthens him immune system, and the brain systematizes the information received. The quality and quantity of sleep affect the baby's behavior during the day.

If a child does not get enough sleep, this negatively affects his behavior during the day. He remembers information worse, eats little, demonstrates his Bad mood, screams, cries, is capricious. Therefore, frequent whims can sometimes indicate that the baby is not getting enough sleep.

Sleep patterns need to be established from the very beginning. early age. It will provide adequate sleep not only for the child, but for the whole family. Every day at the same time, the baby needs to be bathed, changed into pajamas, read a book or sing a lullaby, and put to bed. Sticking strict regime is associated in children with stability.

Physical reasons for crying before bed

When the baby does not go to bed and cries, there is no need to panic, shout at the baby, or express your dissatisfaction. Parents need to calm down, pull themselves together and identify the cause of their child’s anxiety.

The main reasons for a baby's crying

  • The child may refuse to sleep and cry due to hunger. Perhaps he no longer gets enough of his mother's milk and needs to be fed with formula if he is not yet 6 months old, or adult food, if he is more than 6 months old. When such a problem occurs in a baby before six months, this probably means problems with lactation. Mothers should drink special teas that stimulate the production of breast milk, change the feeding position, consult a specialist breastfeeding. Typically, hungry crying begins with a whimper and then turns into a loud, demanding cry. At the same time, the baby shakes its head from side to side, looking for the breast or bottle.
  • The child cries when he cannot sleep. He may be disturbed various factors environment: loud sounds (TV on, highway noise, hammer or drill during repairs), bright lights (it is better to use a night light when putting the child to bed), stuffiness or cold.
  • Many babies refuse to fall asleep when their diaper is full. They announce this by shouting.
  • A plaintive cry is evidence of pain.
  • Teething is an unpleasant process that causes discomfort for many babies. Even if their appearance is still far away, the child may be bothered by itching, which intensifies in the evening when the baby gets tired. Helps soothe itching special ointments or gels.
  • If the baby is hot, his face turns red and his temperature rises. He cannot sleep normally in a poorly ventilated area. Lack of wet cleaning, musty air and dust will not allow the baby to sleep peacefully.
  • If the baby does not yet know how to roll over on his own, he will cry because of the uncomfortable position. Tight or uncomfortable clothes will also cause the child’s indignation. The folds of the blouse on the back may press on him, the seams or the tag may rub.
  • When the baby falls asleep, there should be no sharp loud sounds around. However, he should not sleep in complete silence. It’s better that he gets used to sleeping with monotonous background sounds - work washing machine, muffled voices of household members. This way, his sleep will be stronger, and in the meantime, parents will be able to calmly go about their normal activities without fear of waking up the baby.

Intestinal colic is one of the reasons for crying

A child between 1 and 6 months of age may be bothered intestinal colic. They appear unexpectedly in the late afternoon, often before falling asleep. A child can scream loudly almost continuously for two hours. At the same time, he wiggles his legs and clenches his fists. After he screams and painful sensations disappear, he usually falls asleep.

To help your baby with colic, you can put a warm diaper on his tummy, stroke him clockwise, and carry your baby around the room with his tummy down. Some parents use a hairdryer, directing a stream of warm air onto the baby's tummy, the main thing is not to burn or scare the baby. The tummy warms up and calms down, and the monotonous hum of the hairdryer lulls you to sleep.

IN exceptional cases for colic, use a gas outlet tube or the smallest rubber bulb with the bottom cut off. This is how the gases come out effectively, but if handled carelessly, they can cause harm to the baby.

How to help a baby with colic

To get rid of colic, you can give your baby water dill water, and a nursing mother - tea with fennel. The child can be given medicine: Infacol, Espumisan, Bobotik, Sub-Simplex or others. They all have one thing active substance – simethicone. After the medicine, the child quickly falls asleep. You should be careful, as the flavorings in these drugs can cause allergies.

Colic can be caused by errors in the diet of a nursing mother or dysbacteriosis. In the first case, the mother should reconsider her diet, and in the second, she will need to get tested and, if necessary, take a course of medications with lacto- or bifidobacteria (for example, Bifiform baby). If the child is on artificial feeding, then colic may occur due to the fact that he is fed the wrong mixture.

Sometimes none of the above remedies help with colic. In such cases, parents have to be patient and wait for them to pass.

Vitamin D deficiency

If the baby’s body does not have enough vitamin D, then phosphorus-calcium metabolism is disrupted, which leads to the appearance of rickets. On initial stages The disease causes high neuro-reflex excitability, manifested in crying and deterioration of sleep. The baby becomes fearful and irritable. This symptom usually appears at 3-4 months, but sometimes it can occur after 1.5 months.

Emotional and psychological reasons for crying

A child may cry a lot before falling asleep due to the accumulated fatigue of the day. This often happens in adults too. That is why, when it’s time to go to bed, you need to stop all active games with your baby and start doing quieter activities that soothe and induce sleep. At this time it is recommended to take a walk around fresh air. If you can’t go outside, you can limit yourself to the balcony.

If a child cries before going to bed, the cause may be excessive overexcitation. During the day, the baby receives many impressions, especially if relatives come to visit him.

By screaming and crying, he relieves tension and calms down.

The child should be consoled by stroking, kind words, and singing a lullaby. This may not work at first, but if you repeat this every time, it will emotional stress, he will get used to it, and these actions will calm down faster.

According to statistics, 70% of children under 3 years of age are diagnosed by neurologists as “increased nervous excitability.” There's nothing wrong with that. Children with this diagnosis simply cannot fall asleep until they “scream out” all their excess energy. Their sleep is sensitive, superficial, and is often interrupted by crying.

The baby's crying may be a protest that they are trying to put him to sleep without his mother. If the parents have clearly decided that the child should sleep separately, in a crib intended for him, then they will have to firmly respond to his protests. If it is difficult for them to hear the cries of their child, then it is worth arranging a joint sleep. The baby will feel his mother’s warmth next to him, her smell, hear the beat of her heart, will calm down and sleep soundly. This way the whole family can rest, but the process of “moving” to a separate crib in the future can be very painful.

Thus, a baby’s crying before bed is a signal that something is bothering him and preventing him from falling asleep. Parents must respond to this signal in a timely manner, identify the cause of the discomfort and take maximum opportunities to eliminate it.

Read further:

Happy birthday long-awaited child Parents hope that the baby will eat well, develop quickly and sleep soundly. However, most parents almost immediately encounter a problem bad sleep in a baby, and the most unpleasant thing is prolonged crying before bedtime. During such crying, parents do not find a place for themselves, worrying about why the child is crying before going to bed. It is very difficult to calm such a child - often children continue to cry even in their mother’s arms. In such cases, neither singing, nor gentle rocking, nor calm music usually helps. Let's look at the reasons why children cry before bed, and also find out what parents can do in such a situation.

Reasons why children cry before bed

You'll be surprised to learn how many reasons little ones cry before bed. Their whole life in the first few months after childbirth is sheer stress. Up to 1 year of age, some children regularly cry heavily before bed and even after sleep. Let's look at the most basic of these reasons.

  1. Nervous overstrain. Young children often cannot cope with the stress on their nervous system that they receive during the day. Therefore, 1-2 hours before bedtime, the child begins to cry a lot and in most cases it is impossible to calm him down. Don't rush into panic. For newborn children, this behavior is the norm. With the help of a cry, they are freed from unused energy and relieve nervous tension. The nervous system of young children is still poorly developed and does not work the same as in adults.
  2. Increased nervous excitability. When you contact a pediatric neurologist with complaints about the child’s regular strong crying before bedtime, in most cases the doctor diagnoses “increased nervous excitability.” Don’t be alarmed, 70% of children under 3 years old experience this phenomenon. It lies in the fact that children with increased excitability they simply cannot fall asleep until they “scream out” all their energy. Only after this do they fall asleep calmly and soundly. This evening phenomenon throws parents into confusion and panic, but, oddly enough, there is nothing abnormal or bad about it. For young children, this is absolutely necessary “self-soothing.” This way they fulfill their “crying quota” for the day. Active and vigorous games during the day are contraindicated for children with increased excitability, as well as the slightest violation mode. Their nervous system works in such a way that the more tired they are physically or psychologically, the more difficult it will be for them to fall asleep. The sleep of such children is usually very sensitive and superficial, often interrupted by crying. Most children with high nervous excitability They also wake up crying.
  3. Lack of regime. It is this reason that mainly causes problems with falling asleep in young children. Establishing a correct and clear bedtime routine can solve the problem of a child crying before bed. Some parents believe that the child should go to bed when he has had enough of playing and wants to. Pediatricians and neurologists believe that this is not so. Children are very conservative and they associate having a strict routine, which they strictly adhere to day after day, with stability and calm. After a short period of training, your baby will already know that after certain procedures a night's sleep follows and will go to bed without protests.
  4. Colic. In the first few months of life, colic plagues newborns quite often. With colic, babies cry a lot, pressing their legs to their tummy. It is difficult to calm a colicky baby - to do this, place a warm diaper on his tummy or place the baby on your bare stomach. Giving your child fennel tea or Plantex helps effectively. However, there are situations when these methods do not help the child cope with colic. In this case they will help him medicines, neutralizing increased gas formation, for example, Espumisan.
  5. Teeth are being cut. Teething often causes anxiety and sleep disturbances in young children. Swollen gums cause painful sensations that bring significant discomfort to the child. Even very calm kids During the teething period, they often cry for a long time before going to bed, reporting their discomfort. You can help the baby by anointing the gums with anesthetic gel. You can recognize such a period by the baby’s behavior before and during it. If before this baby was calmly falling asleep, but now suddenly began to cry every day before going to bed, most likely his teeth are bothering him. This period, most often, does not last long and you just need to survive it.
  6. Fright. This is a common reason for crying infants before and after sleep. Perhaps your baby doesn't like the darkness and the fact that he can't see or feel his mother. Children also often dream scary dreams, after which the babies wake up crying heavily. In this case, it is better to calm the baby by gently stroking him and quietly whispering words of reassurance to him. Co-sleeping with your mother is the ideal solution to this problem.

Based on personal experience, I can say that if a child’s crying is not caused by physiological reasons, but is a consequence of increased excitement of the nervous system, then there is no need to calm him down. The child will still have to scream until he “releases” all the unused energy. This will not harm the baby’s health and this phenomenon will disappear over time. Well, as a parent, I just had to be patient, trying to calmly go through these moments.

What to do if your child cries a lot before bed

The most important thing is that you don’t need to panic or become hysterical. Crying is completely natural and normal for a child. First of all, try to establish the cause of crying, ruling out first physiological reasons eg hunger, cold, dirty diaper, tight clothes or an uncomfortable position. If you have done all this, and the child still continues to cry inconsolably, then check his gums. It's possible he's just teething. In this case, you can anoint his gums with an anesthetic gel or give him Nurofen for children.

If your baby constantly cries before going to bed every day, most likely, he is simply overexcited during the day. You can try to reduce the load on his nervous system during the day, for example, reduce the time he watches TV, eliminate too active games, recess environment and people.

Taking a warm bath every evening with a decoction of soothing herbs will also help relax the baby’s nervous system and tune it to sound sleep. Be sure to follow the same bedtime routine, performing procedures in the same sequence at the same time.

Whatever the reason that caused your child to cry before or after bedtime, be sure to report this phenomenon to your local pediatrician. Most likely, you will be prescribed a consultation with a neurologist or other specialists. If your child suffers from anxiety or persistent sleep disorders, he or she will need help. qualified specialists, since it is often not always possible to cope with these problems on your own. Without proper sleep, a child will not be able to develop quickly, and his body will not be able to function properly.

And remember that children in the first years of life are associated with the strongest mother emotional connection Therefore, the child subtly feels the mood and emotions of the mother, taking them on himself. Many mothers notice that when they are calm, the baby sleeps soundly, and when they start to get nervous, the child also becomes capricious and whiny. Therefore, take care of your nerves, be patient and remain calm, even if your baby cries a lot before going to bed. This period will soon pass and your baby will sleep soundly and peacefully.