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How to understand that psychology is deceiving you. How to find out that your husband is cheating and deceiving: characteristic signs in behavior, an accurate psychological test

According to statistics, every person manages to lie at least 4 times a day, since the truth often contradicts generally accepted standards of decency, ethics and even morality. How to recognize a lie if not a single modern detector is able to give one hundred percent guarantee that what a person says is not a deception? Let's define external signs lies that will betray your interlocutor.

What kind of untruth can happen?

Often deception is harmless when a person tells a lie out of politeness or out of a desire to be liked (“You look great!”, “Very glad to meet you!”). Sometimes people have to withhold the whole truth or remain silent in response to awkward questions out of reluctance to escalate the situation, and this is also considered insincerity.

However, psychologists say that even seemingly harmless lies can seriously harm relationships, especially when it comes to understatement between family members: husband and wife, parents and children. It is difficult to achieve mutual trust and maintain strong family ties in such circumstances, so it is important to know how to recognize the lies of a man, woman or child.

Observations of specialists in the field of psychology have shown certain results that relate to deception in the family:

despite their outward openness to their interlocutor, extroverts are more prone to lies than introverts;
children quickly learn to lie in authoritarian families, and they do it often and masterfully;
parents who behave gently towards their child notice lies immediately, since he rarely deceives and lies uncertainly;
the female sex is prone to deception when it comes to everyday things - they hide the price of purchased goods, do not tell about a broken cup or a burnt dish, etc.;
Men are characterized by understatement in matters of relationships, they hide their dissatisfaction with their partners, have mistresses and confidently lie about their fidelity.

How to learn to recognize a lie?

To prevent the development of complex family relations built on deception, infidelity and understatement, it is important to learn to understand sincerity. Often the ability to deduce a deceiver clean water is a natural talent of a person who intuitively knows how to recognize a lie by facial expressions, gestures or intonation of the interlocutor. Helps him with this life experience communication with liars, or natural observation.

This does not mean that anyone cannot spot deception without the appropriate experience or talent. Currently, psychology has established some verbal and nonverbal signs of information distortion that are typical for most people. Thanks to a well-developed methodology based on understanding such signals, each person will be able to develop the ability to recognize insincerity. Let's find out what can reveal a liar.

One of the most common opinions associated with human behavior and identifying deception, is that we can accurately identify a liar simply by observing him, his behavior, gestures and eyes. Those. detect deception by the eyes, words, and gestures of the interlocutor. How can you understand that you are being deceived? In fact, numerous studies on deception show that detecting deception is much more difficult.

How to understand that you are being deceived? Identify deception by the eyes

We mistakenly believe that we need to judge the amount of eye contact we make during a conversation. We seem to be relying on the old adage that honest man always looks directly into the eyes of the interlocutor.

However, research shows that when talking to other people, we do not strive to maintain constant eye contact. Therefore, attempts to determine deception by the eyes are not always successful: you may suspect an honest person of deception.

If, for example, the topic under discussion is unpleasant for us, if we feel the condescension of the interlocutor or we ourselves despise him, then, most likely, we will try not to look him in the eyes.

Scientists who have studied eye contact have found that the amount of contact a person makes depends largely on cultural or ethnic background and also depends on whether a person is an introvert or an extrovert by nature. Relying on the eyes to detect deception is a very unreliable method.

How to spot deception by the eyes. Type of eyes

How to understand that you are being deceived? When communicating with a friend or relative, pay attention to the appearance of their eyes. By appearance I mean how the eyes look - that is, their shape or configuration and the condition of those areas of the face that are directly adjacent to the eyes.

If you notice that the interlocutor's eyebrows are raised high and his eyes are wide open, it means that he is experiencing a state of shock or surprise. At the same time, some people exhibit an interesting behavior called "san-paku", that is, they show three whites of the eyes.

How to spot deception by the eyes. Look into the eyes of your spouse or friend. Please note that two white areas are usually visible in each eye - near the nose and in the opposite corner of the eye. When some people experience fear, surprise, shock or strong fear, there are three such white areas, and sometimes even four.

The third area is located above or below the iris. When there are four such areas, they appear both above and below the iris. At the same time, you will probably notice that the person raises his eyebrows very high. Similar condition indicates that your interlocutor is experiencing extreme stress.

On the other hand, you may notice that the eyes and surrounding areas of the face have noticeably softened. In this case, the eyes become wider and rounder. The muscles relax, which leads to softer cheeks and the entire face as a whole. The eyebrows may also be raised a little higher than usual. This is how you can detect deception by looking at your eyes.

This expression often appears when a person is experiencing a certain amount of emotional pain or depression. It can be noticed when a person needs to win in negotiations and he tries to change the interlocutor’s attitude towards himself or towards his actions and plans. Such a facial expression should indicate openness and sincerity, but in fact it only indicates evasiveness.

How to spot deception by speech

How to spot deception by clarity of speech

Speech dysfunction. To understand that you are being deceived, keep in mind: deceivers demonstrate significantly greater speech dysfunction than telling the truth. Like all the signs and symptoms we've already talked about, not all types of speech dysfunction indicate deception. Sometimes mistakes are the result of mental stress experienced by the speaker.

However, the presence of symptoms of speech dysfunction may indicate that a person views the current moment as convenient for deception. So, while not all of the symptoms we've talked about mean the person is lying, they should still alert you.

Having noticed them, in order to determine deception by speech, you need to listen to the interlocutor especially carefully. Once you determine your interlocutor's clarity score, you must take into account all the other verbal and nonverbal signals he is sending at the same time. Remember that you must identify behavioral clusters, not individual signals.

How to understand that you are being deceived in a conversation

You can learn to direct the conversation in any direction you want. Let me give you an example. Let's imagine you come to a friend's house and she shows you the newfangled dining table she just bought.

You want to know if it’s expensive, but it’s awkward to ask directly. If you tell your friend that this is the most luxurious and expensive looking table you have ever seen, what do you think she will say? It is likely that she will say that she paid a tidy sum for him.

If you say: “Yes, it looks very expensive. How could you pay so much money for a dining table?”, then your girlfriend will probably start talking about what excellent quality it is, what excellent materials it is made of, etc.

Consequently, if you note beauty, the interlocutor will talk about cost; if you talk about price, it will talk about quality. In other words, by asking the right questions, you guide the conversation in the right direction and get necessary information.

Moreover, if you wish, in order to determine deception in a conversation, you can also control the way you react. Have you ever noticed that if you smile at someone you meet by chance, they will smile back. If you smile and nod, he will do the same. You say hello and he will probably greet you too.

Consequently, the method of communication is chosen by the one who reacts to the situation first.

The same applies to the pace of conversation. Try this experiment. Ask someone a question that doesn't have a one-word answer; try to speak slowly and clearly. You will see that the interlocutor will not be in a hurry when answering. And then ask the question at a fast pace, and the answer will probably be the same.

How to spot deception in a conversation. If you want to learn how to recognize deception, learn to direct the conversation in the specific direction you need. This can be easily achieved with just a few well-chosen words. After the other person makes a statement, use one of the words and phrases below to direct the conversation in the direction you need to get the information. They can be used in any conversation.

Dear Kamila Maratovna!

Our body language, compared to other verbal (speech) means of communication, is unique. If you imagine that it is he who carries from 60 to 80 percent of the information transmitted to the interlocutor, it is easy to understand the need to interpret this method of contact. If we want to be sure that we have accurately understood a person, we must combine big picture information from the body and verbal expressions.
Who among us has not encountered a feeling of vague anxiety when communicating with a person when he claimed one thing, but subconsciously you felt his falsehood. You will say that this is intuition and good for those who have it. In fact, it is easy to develop intuition by observing your interlocutor and, knowing the specific meaning of gestures, draw the right conclusions.

It has been established that lie recognition is possible at the following levels: psychophysiological, verbal (verbal) and nonverbal (facial expressions, posture, gestures). At the psychophysiological level, information comes in the form of external manifestations of functioning internal organs, which are almost impossible for a person to control. At the verbal level - checking the logical consistency of information and compliance with non-verbal components of interaction.

Is it possible to fake body language and other behavioral components that may indicate a lie?

Experts in nonverbal communication say no, and if it does, it leads to inconsistency between verbal and nonverbal manifestations, which is immediately obvious and indicates insincerity. For example, it is believed that open palms are a sign that the interlocutor is telling the truth. But if the deceiver smiles and deliberately uses this gesture, and at the same time tells a lie, he will be betrayed by other manifestations that indicate his insincerity. Such micromovements and microsignals appear for a split second and are often invisible, but, as a rule, they are noticeable to people with developed intuition and, of course, to specialists involved in the field of nonverbal communications. Such microsignals include curvature of the facial muscles, often asymmetrical, dilation or constriction of the pupils, rapid blinking, blushing and many others. In particular, in such situations, you feel that something is wrong, but you cannot understand what it is.

Psychophysiological symptoms of lying

So, the psychophysiological symptoms of lying. We can say that lying is not a characteristic manifestation of human actions. Therefore, in a situation of deception, the body seems to “express” its resistance to this, reacts to stress and therefore behaves differently. These physiological manifestations it is difficult for an ordinary person to control, unless of course he has perfect regulatory abilities, which not everyone can do. First of all, this:

Trembling in the voice, body, which the interlocutor cannot stop;
increased blinking;
a person tenses his lips, bites them, “chews”;
over upper lip, beads of sweat appear on the forehead;
frequent or forceful swallowing of saliva;
desire to drink (due to dry mouth);
coughing (on nervous soil), possible periodic stuttering;
the voice takes on a different tone, not characteristic of the interlocutor, the rhythm and timbre changes;
confused, restless breathing, may not get enough air, yawning;
changes in complexion, pallor or redness, the skin may become blotchy;
rapid heartbeat, pulsation of blood in the temples, carotid artery;
twitching of small facial muscles (eyelid, eyebrow, etc.).
Gesticulation and facial expressions with insincerity

Most people, as we have already noted, find it more difficult to lie than to tell the truth. This explains the difference from usual behavior a person who lies. He often changes his position and cannot sit in one place. His gestures become more active, he can make many unnecessary movements with his hands, so external manifestations You can easily detect a person’s excitement. A person who tells a lie often:

Rubbing his hands, fiddling with his fingers, scratching his neck, head, face for no reason;
fiddles with the edges of clothes, buttons, cuffs, twirls a pen or keys in his hands, plays with objects, senselessly rearranges stacks of papers, books located nearby on the table, etc., imitating putting things in order;
smokes heavily, puffs more often than usual, coughs, touches the throat;
nervously bites lips, nails, tugs at hair;
can’t stop his knees from shaking;
unconsciously hides, hides hands, covers the palms of the hands;
he runs his hand tensely over his neck, rubs it intensely, as if it were stiff, adjusts his collar, jacket, laces;
unconsciously holds his hands in the groin area (an unconscious attempt to defend himself);
often touches the earlobes, rubs them, scratches the nose;
when speaking, he brings his hand to his mouth, as if covering it, or holds his hand near his throat;
women can begin to carefully preen themselves, tint their lips, put on powder, trying, as it were, to distract themselves and distract the interlocutor from the conversation;
avoids looking into the eyes of the interlocutor (only for inexperienced people) or, on the contrary, constantly looks straight into the eyes, trying to seem frank, when approaching a partner, turns away for some reason, in fact, in order not to create direct eye contact;
lowers his eyes, looks down, intensely, intensely rubs them;
seems to be trying to hide his body, “sticks” all over the chair when he sits, leans his elbows on the table, unnaturally leans against the closet, as if trying to find support, etc.;
involuntarily tries to hold on to some object (table, chair, diplomat), unconsciously trying to create some kind of protection for himself;
the body bends back (“withdrawal”);
smiles more often than usual, the smile is asymmetrical, unnatural, tense, not accompanied by tension in the muscles around the eyes.
It is very important to monitor the appearance similar actions. Similar behavior may appear when discussing a specific topic of conversation, if this is not a direct planned deception. Keep track of exactly when your interlocutor begins to behave this way, shows anxiety, and excessive tension. At what phrase or in response to what statement or question of yours does he begin to get nervous, cover his mouth with his hand, or avert his eyes.

Verbal cues that indicate lies

Fixing only one nonverbal cues and psychophysiological manifestations are not enough to determine how sincere your interlocutor is. In addition to directly observing a person’s behavior, it is undoubtedly important how attentive you are to his statements. Here we mean not only the semantic content of a particular message, but the nature and direction of the information that you receive. So, if during communication your interlocutor abuses the following expressions, you should be careful in your conclusions and be quite attentive.

1. If your partner avoids explaining any specific facts, refers to a lack of information, provided that these topics and questions do not relate to those that cause him discomfort and memories.

Examples:

I don't want to talk about it...
I can't remember something...
I don't see the point in this discussion...
I don’t even know how to answer this question...
Don't ask me such stupid questions...
I had no idea that you thought of me this way...
2. The partner extremely persistently and persistently emphasizes his honesty, repeats this in the absence visible reasons, insists on your confirmation that you believe him.

Examples:

I swear to you the health of my children, parents...
Yes, I may fail in this place if I lie...
You have to, you just have to believe me...
This is as true as...
I swear to God, I'm telling the truth, believe me, you can't help but believe...
You cannot doubt that I am telling the truth, I know you, you are always for justice...
It was not for nothing that the eastern sages said: “You said it once - I believed it, you repeated it, and I doubted it, you said it a third time, and I realized that you were lying.”

3. Your interlocutor is trying to arouse your sympathy, trust, pity, referring to facts that previously had no meaning, trying to win you over, although the relationship never implied special closeness.

Examples:

You know, I'm an honest person...
You know me like no one else, I am not capable of deceiving...
Well, here's someone, but so that I...
I have the same problems as you, but...
Someone, and you will understand me, I'm sure...
4. The interlocutor shows unreasonable rudeness, straightforwardness, emphasizes the impossibility of questioning his words, is hostile for no apparent reason that could cause aggression or discontent in him.

Examples:

Yes, I don’t have to answer you anything at all!
You know what!
How could you even think, shame on you!?
I don’t even want to talk to you after this!
What you say infuriates me, I am outraged to the core!
Why would you treat me like that, but I won’t allow it..!
Do you think you are so smart, you can do anything!?
5. The partner uses evasive answers that do not convey any specific information, without explaining anything or answering your question:

Examples:
You see, everything is as I said...
I knew it...
Do you respect me?
Yes, you are a serious person...
I'm not at all sure about this...
As a rule, a sincere person will defend his truthfulness when you doubt it, therefore ambiguity and evasiveness are unusual for a person in this situation. If your interlocutor is lying, then each time it will be more and more difficult for him to hide his lie and control his spontaneous behavior, so he:
makes more gestures that reveal his nervousness, uncertainty, tension (see above);
distracts you with unnecessary questions, details that are not directly related to the matter, “chatters” you with false information, sometimes begins to quickly pronounce and explain his lies;
when repeated, it can get confused and provide inconsistent information;
answers after long pauses;
often shows aggression and discontent for no reason;
can complain about feeling unwell(It was you who brought him up with your suspicions!).
Factors that make it difficult to detect lies

In communication, in particular when it comes to negotiations, the interlocutors have an idea of what they have to say, how they have to respond to possible questions from your side. The ratio of complexly organized lies to the truth is calculated in advance. Therefore, the more thoroughly your partner prepared for the meeting with you (and if he simply had the opportunity to do this), the higher the likelihood that if there is a lie, you will not be able to recognize it.

The more you are disposed towards your partner, the more you trust him, the easier it will be for him to mislead you. So try not to mix business relations and personal. on this issue, it would not hurt you to turn to “KP” N 11, 2002. But you should not go to extremes, suspecting everyone and everything of the intention to deceive you. This will already relate to clinical deviations, which, I hope, does not threaten you.

Next. Pay attention to what information we're talking about, i.e. who exactly is responsible for it. If another person, for example, a higher-ranking person, is responsible for false facts, then the speaker will feel more confident, because. this reduces his feelings of guilt.

If the interlocutor is faced with the task not of distorting information, but simply hiding it, then it will be more difficult for you to detect it. Therefore, at the slightest suspicion about understatement or the presence of other details, try to be vigilant. Monitor your partner’s behavior, his reaction to a particular topic under discussion, note what your interlocutor is avoiding, ask leading questions.

And another factor that makes it difficult to detect lies is the inability to see a person when talking to him. Remember that telephone conversation- this is far from best option negotiations, even if clarification of the issue is urgent. Of course, the choice depends on what will be negotiated and how meaningful and serious the issues will be raised. However, do not forget that it is better to postpone important question for a while rather than discussing it immediately, possibly losing some of the information you need. Not in vain English proverb says: “Believe only half of what you see and none of what you hear.”

Factors that make it easier to diagnose lies:

Naturally, there are situations when, with all the desire, your interlocutor will hardly be able to hide his lie. For example, if a person is known in the team as a fighter for justice, as a decent person who is not capable of lying, it will be “a priori” difficult for him to do this.

If your interlocutor needs to hide the true feelings that manifest themselves in at the moment conversation rather than information, it will be more difficult for him to do this. Not only will he have to manage his emotional state, which not everyone does brilliantly, but he will also need to hide it under the guise of another emotional reaction. Such a discrepancy is quite easy to detect if you wish.

The significance of the lie for the liar has a strong influence. The greater the significance of a lie for a partner, the more people wants to lie, the more he will be concerned about his behavior, the more he will control himself, and the more obvious will be the discrepancies between verbal and non-verbal signs, for example, words and actions, gestures and facial expressions, face and intonation.

How to prepare for deception?

If you suspect that your interlocutor is lying to you, do the following:

Look at him point-blank, with an expression of doubt about the veracity of the information he conveys to you;
ask him direct questions, looking into his eyes, and observe his reaction;
try to react with bright but slight irony to some of his statements;
express yourself as much as possible emotional state, actively use facial expressions and gestures to provoke a response from your partner;
turn your palms down;
make your interlocutor feel uncomfortable, in particular, seat him with his back to an open space;
try to interrupt him a couple of times with an unexpected question, thereby preventing him from expressing his false statement to the end and taking him by surprise, asking him to immediately answer the question asked;
approach your partner, violating his personal space, going beyond his intimate zone.
These actions may confuse the interlocutor, telling a lie, unbalance his thoughts and actions. This is necessary so that uncertainty, tension, nervousness, inability to quickly collect thoughts and quickly answer questions prevent the creation favorable conditions for a liar.

For most people, telling a lie is much more difficult than telling the truth. Therefore, the internal conflict of the liar is reflected in his external behavior, which he tries with all his might to control, in psychophysiological manifestations that treacherously tell us that the person is extremely excited and tense - in the words and statements of the liar, which are so often inconsistent, confusing and sometimes inadequate. Be careful, but don’t become a maniac, counting the number of blinks and beads of sweat on your forehead. Perhaps the person is worried about something completely different, and now there is nothing left to do but just let him calm down and come to his senses. After all, your employees and subordinates are people who are prone to make mistakes.

Is it possible to determine by appearance interlocutor, that he is deceiving you? Similar questions were raised by watching the sensational series “The Theory of Lies” (Lie to me). Main character series - Dr. Cal Lightman - miraculously accurately calculates deception based on signs invisible to the naked eye - subtle movements of facial muscles, voice changes, hand movements, etc. For the “uninitiated” it seems like magic or tricks, but the essence of the work practical psychologist It often comes down to exactly this - reading between the lines, hearing not the words, but what stands behind them, seeing what no one pays attention to. The prototype of Lightman and the main consultant of the series is University of California psychology professor Paul Ekman, the world's largest researcher of the theory of deception (his book “The Psychology of Lies” has been translated into Russian). How can you use modern psychological research lies in everyday communication, what should you pay attention to in order to distinguish truth from deception?

Of course, words often betray lies. A deceiver can get confused in his lies, or, on the contrary, tell everything too smoothly; deception is often betrayed by random “slips of the tongue”, “speech slips”, which, as is also known from Freud’s theory, reveal a person’s true (sometimes unconscious) desires and feelings. But trying to catch a person in words, starting a “verbal game” is often very tedious and unproductive. Therefore, psychologists pay more attention to the nonverbal (nonverbal) behavior of the interlocutor. This includes facial expressions, voice, physiological manifestations and body movements.

1.Facial muscles are associated with areas of the brain responsible for emotions, so the face reflects what we are experiencing. Usually a face carries two messages at once - what the liar wants to say and what he would like to hide. When a person lies, his most eloquent facial expression, which you first of all pay attention to, turns out to be a fake, and more subtle signs hidden emotions remain, as a rule, unnoticed. The most common way to mask feelings is a smile, behind which a person can hide confusion, anger, sadness, etc. During the experiments, it was found that it is much easier to portray anger and disgust, and much more difficult to believably imitate fear and grief. Facial expressions change very quickly, so a frozen facial expression that is too long (more than 5-10 seconds, and for surprise - longer than a second) indicates insincerity of feelings. Studies of one of the psychotherapeutic directions (NLP) also revealed the directions of eye movements characteristic of a deceiving person. Most often these will be movements from the right above or from the side and to the left downwards (first constructs an image or sound and then thinks about how to say it). An ordinary person I’m just not used to paying attention to microexpressions, blurred emotions, and the direction of eye movements, but anyone can learn this if they want.

2. If we somehow know how to control facial expressions, then control physiological reactions accompanying strong emotions is much more difficult. Even in ancient times, knowledge of physiological changes caused by excitement and fear that the liar is trying to hide was used to expose lies. Yes, in the tribes West Africa suspects were given a bird's egg, the shell of which cracks easily. All suspects had to pass this egg to each other - and the one who was guilty of the crime would crush it, thereby exposing himself. IN Ancient China the suspect had to put a handful of dry rice in his mouth and listen to the accusation; salivation stopped for fear of exposure, and if the rice remained dry in his mouth, the suspect’s guilt was considered proven. It is on the measurement physiological changes(pulse, pressure, skin temperature, etc.) based on the work of a lie detector.

3.Body movements, important for determining whether your interlocutor is telling the truth or a lie, are divided into 3 types.

1.Emblems- these are fingers folded into a figure, a shrug, etc. - all those poses and movements for which a certain and completely single value. During an experiment conducted in Paul Ekman's laboratory, a female student, during a provocative conversation with a teacher, showed him the finger (“I had you”). Neither she nor the teacher recorded this movement, and were shocked to see it recorded. Such movements are similar in nature to speech slips, and if the emblem breaks through during a conversation, most likely it is the one that carries the truth.

2.Unlike emblems illustrations- these are hand movements not loaded with a special meaning that accompany speech, which seem to help a person express himself more clearly and clearly. A person who is sincerely and enthusiastically telling something will actively use illustration movements. During deception, the number of illustrations is reduced or they look unnatural. However, strong sad feelings, and simply a lack of interest, boredom can also significantly reduce the number of illustrations.

3. Rubbing behind the ear, scratching, obsessively smoothing out folds of tissue on the knee - all this manipulation. It is generally accepted that the anxiety and shame that accompany deception increases the number of manipulations. However, it was found that manipulation can also intensify when a person feels comfortable and relaxed, “among his own people.”

Knowing all these signs helps only when you can connect all the factors together - what a person says, what emotions he shows, what emotions he tries to hide, what physiological manifestations he shows and how his body moves. It is not enough to determine that a person experiences the fear, guilt, or elation that characterizes deception. An honest person who is unfairly suspected or accused may experience similar feelings. A person can, due to his personal history, react with guilt or fear to harmless questions, which is why the lie detector is so often wrong.

An important sign of deception is inconsistency verbal and non-verbal information (for example, saying “yes” waves his head negatively). However, each person is unique, so in order to detect a lie, the most important thing is to know how that particular person behaves when he tells the truth. It is not any specific sign of lying that is important, it is much more important change behavior that is characteristic of that person. It is difficult not to notice, at least on a subconscious level, such changes in a person you know well, but for some reason, among close people, deception can remain undiscovered for a long time. And here something else plays a role - do we ourselves want to know the truth, can we accept and recognize it?

Good afternoon, dear readers! Today I won't tell you anything useful. And that's a lie. We encounter lies at work, at home, at school, with friends. It is unpleasant and disgusting to be deceived. I present to your attention detailed instructions, how to recognize a lie: 10 mistakes of a liar.

A fairy tale is a lie, but there is a hint in it

How many times in your life have you encountered a person who seemed strange to you, you felt that he was not telling something, that he was disingenuous. Have you noticed that you subconsciously don’t trust his facial expressions, gestures, and speech?

But how to detect deception and not fall for a liar?

If you want to become an expert in this field, then be sure to read Paul Ekman "Psychology of Lies" and Pamela Meyer "How to recognize a lie".

Now we will look at the most common signs by which you can expose a liar to clean water. Remember that a lot depends on the context; a certain gesture will not always mean a lie. Be careful and vigilant.

Mistake #1 “Left Side”

Body language often speaks much louder than a person's speech. Right-handers tend to have good control right side of your body. Track direction right hand and legs. You can easily subjugate an unbridled hand.

Therefore, lie detection experts advise looking closely at the left side of a person. His left hand will hang around randomly, actively gesticulate, touch his face, and so on.

The left side of our body shows our real emotions, experiences and feelings. With quality observation, you can clearly see the signs of lying.

Mistake #2 “Hands to face”

Pay close attention to the gestures of your interlocutor. Signs of lying are covering your mouth, rubbing your nose, holding or scratching your neck, covering your ear, talking through your teeth. All this, if repeated many times, will practically scream that the person is deceiving.

It is important here not to confuse such a gesture with simply scratching a bite, for example. Or this behavior may be characteristic of your interlocutor.

I have a friend who constantly scratches his nose. It doesn't matter whether he's telling the truth or lying. Women resort to touching their neck or hair to show their interest in a man. So be extremely careful with such signals.

Mistake #3 “Speech”

If you want to make sure that a person is lying, then carefully watch his speech. In a conversation with a liar, you will notice a lot of understatement, a crumpled pace of speech, sometimes he speaks quickly, sometimes slowly. Most often, a liar's speech begins slowly, but then, out of fear of being discovered, he speeds up and may even end his story abruptly.

Liars often resort to a large number pauses in your story. This gives them time to think and evaluate your reaction. You will also notice fluctuations in your speech. To make things easier for themselves, liars repeat your own words. For example, when you ask a question, he will quickly repeat last words. "Where were you at last week? - “Last week I was...”

Mistake #4 “Eyes”

It’s not for nothing that they say that the eyes are the mirror of the soul. In the case of meeting a liar, the eyes will be one of the main factors by which you can bring him to clean water. Deceivers try not to look directly at their interlocutor; they always look away.

You can even ask him to tell you the story while looking him in the eye. The liar will be confused, embarrassed and will still try to look away.

Mistake #5 “Emotions”

Facial expressions, as a component of body language, say a lot about what a person would like to keep silent about. The most common example is when a person tells you that he is glad to see you, but smiles only a moment later.

True emotions are expressed in parallel with speech. But the fictitious emotion is displayed on the face with a delay.

Mistake #6: “Being short”

When a liar comes up with his speech, he tries to make it as short and laconic as possible. You rarely hear a detailed and detailed story from the lips of a professional liar.

Brevity allows you to quickly post your version and evaluate your opponent’s reaction. Did he believe it? But then the seventh mistake happens.

Mistake #7 “Unnecessary parts”

When a person briefly outlines the essence of his false story to you, but begins to doubt your gullibility, he immediately embellishes the story with detailed, unnecessary, and sometimes pretentious details. In this way, he tries to make his story more believable.

Notice at what points the person begins to add details and detail. Are they needed in the story, are they necessary and important in your conversation.

Mistake #8 “Protection”

Another liar's move is to defend himself against your doubts. As soon as you express your distrust, you will immediately hear “Do you think I look like a liar? Am I lying to you? Don't you believe me? and so on.

Liars may resort to sarcasm and jokes to cover up their lies. Do not confuse this with the normal behavior of a person.

There are those comrades who are always trying to impress their interlocutor with their sense of humor.
In addition, sarcasm and rudeness in the relationship between husband and wife may mean that they have serious problems Sincerely.

Mistake #9 “Attention”

The deceiver will watch your reaction very carefully. He will attribute the slightest change in your facial expressions to distrust or his complete victory. As soon as you frown slightly, he immediately changes tactics, because he considers this a sign of mistrust.

A person who tells the truth will be more interested in his story than in your reaction to it. And the liar will try to understand whether you swallowed his bait or not.

Mistake #10: Confusion

If you ask your interlocutor to tell a story backwards, the person who is telling the truth will easily do this trick. But a liar will begin to get confused, remember what he told you, and in the end may not give any answer at all.

In addition, in the liar’s speeches there may be inconsistencies in dates, times, and places. If you follow the story carefully, you can find a couple of similar moments,

Let's sum it up

Don't jump to conclusions. If you notice one or two of the signs described above, this does not always mean that the person is lying to you. More the right approach will learn to see the combination of these signs.

When you know for sure that a person is lying to you, do not say so right away. Practice your observation skills. Study his facial expressions and gestures. Ask questions that don't have an expected answer.

A friend of mine came up with a spectacular maneuver. During his speech, he deliberately sneezed loudly when he wanted to convince his interlocutor that he was right. And with the words “I sneezed, it means I’m telling the truth,” he smiled solemnly.

Best wishes to you!