Changing management, even if the relationship with the previous one was not very good, is always stressful. Whether he is an energetic reformer or calmly continues the strategy of his predecessor, change is inevitable. And change means anxiety and stress. In such a situation, a person, even if he is a super professional, often reproduces biological self-defense mechanisms. There are only three of them. The first (most popular) is to pretend to be part environment, attract as much as possible less attention. The second (quite rare) is, on the contrary, to fire a “warning salvo”, to demonstrate fangs and claws. The third (rare, but bright) is to demonstrate your loyalty in every possible way, bring ripe bananas or beautiful shells in order to earn the favor of the dominant male (female)...

There is nothing offensive in such associations - Homo sapiens cannot break away from its nature, no matter how hard it tries. But biological strategies in this situation are not the most successful. But how should you behave in order to build the most constructive and useful relationships with your new bosses?

First, you need to understand what the new boss wants to achieve, what his goals are, says Vera Anistsyna, recruitment consultant at the UNITY personnel center. - And also what is his strategy: there is a desire to change personnel and bring “his” people or work with the old one. And in any case, work with full dedication, and not only the result is important, but also visual effects - neatly filed files, a clean desk, competent database management, etc. You shouldn’t be too “modest” or belittle your achievements; this will rather make a negative impression, convincing your boss that you are not a particularly valuable employee.

You should not collect all the rumors about the new boss; they are often unreliable and subjective. When your boss wants to get to know you, he will tell you about his plans.

Show professionalism and competence, advises Alexey Zakharov, president of the recruiting portal Superjob.ru. - If the new leader immediately feels in you good specialist, he will listen to your opinion. But you should not try to win at the expense of your own colleagues: never criticize them in an attempt to increase your authority.

Don't compare your new boss to your previous boss. At first, this comparison will always not be in his favor, the head of the department of personnel management at the Institute for Advanced Training of Civil Servants reveals the secrets of success. Russian Academy civil service under the President of the Russian Federation, Doctor of Psychology Takhir Bazarov. - Before expressing your opinion, try to hear the opinion of the new boss. Stick to it business etiquette: nothing personal - business comes first. And finally, do everything you know how to do, but very well, to the maximum.

The most important thing is not to enter into a competitive relationship with the new bosses, recommends Konstantin Surnov, a senior researcher at the Department of Psychology at Moscow State University, candidate of psychological sciences. - You will obviously lose in it, but you will not get any benefit. You need to try to understand the boss, and for this you need to carefully observe and be sincerely interested in him. And one more thing: don’t be afraid of him, he himself is not very comfortable in the new place at first.

Any situation must be turned to your advantage, says Marina Melia, a well-known coach and director of the consulting company MM-Class. - A change in leadership is a powerful incentive for one’s own development. It's time to put things in order, part with old documents, disassemble your desktop, pay attention to your appearance- perhaps it's time to change the image. You should not collect all the rumors about the new boss; they are often unreliable and subjective. When your boss wants to get to know you, he will tell you about his plans and ask about yours - be prepared for this.

Tyrants and tyrants meet on our way very often, and according to the law of meanness, in most cases these are our bosses. IN best case scenario he simply may not notice you, at worst - scold and show off bad attitude. How to build your relationship with the main person of the company or department, so that if you don’t win his love, then at least make your life at work more or less bearable?
It happens that a person simply has complex character(and it’s rare for anyone to become a boss by being a wimp). What is offensive to you may be okay for him. You can try to explain that certain statements by your boss offend you, and perhaps he will even somehow take this into account. If you can’t explain yourself to your boss directly, try to accept him for who he is. Please also consider that a person of a different gender, age, views, or personality type may be very different from your ideas about the ideal boss. And here it is advisable to adapt to all the characteristics of the boss, because for now he is the boss.

For example, a tough, domineering leader will not be happy if you endlessly put forward your own, even the most wonderful ideas, contradicting his policies. He believes that you must follow all his instructions unconditionally. A democratic manager places more emphasis on team building and effective communication. This person will appreciate the ability to work in a team. This must be taken into account.
The problem of fathers and children has also not been canceled. However, you should not forget that you are at work. You are a valuable employee in exactly the right place, so do not “shake” in the face of superiors who are older than you, but calmly and confidently express your point of view, not imposing, but persuading. On the contrary, the young boss needs your support. Show him that you respect him, refer him to the right decision, your experience is on your side.
It is difficult to talk about the influence of gender here. It’s easier for women to get into relationships somewhere. Same-sex colleagues understand each other more easily. Everything is too individual for each person to draw any rules regarding gender.

If the boss is a beech

So, if the boss is a bitch, try to adhere to the following rules:
- if a work problem arises, be prepared to provide options for solving the situation. Prepare convincing arguments. Hide your emotionality away.
- if you made a mistake, show that you made the appropriate conclusions. For example, you can say that next time in similar situation take into account all the little things that were not taken into account in in this case. Learn to take responsibility.
- be active, expand your field of activity, show your superiors that you are always ready to learn new things. If you have ideas, work them through carefully before going to the boss. Think about where he might disagree with you, and offer an alternative in advance.
- don’t “pull” your boss over trifles. Go to him only if you really have doubts and cannot answer this question yourself, or this does not apply to your authority.
Small practical advice: when talking, you can copy the gestures of your interlocutor, tone of voice, pace of speech, this gives the interlocutor the opportunity to subconsciously feel your inner agreement. Catch the boss's gaze, but don't look straight at him, this gives rise to aggression.

You're the boss, I'm the fool

If the high authorities do not like you, then a slightly different tactic is needed. Of course, everything described above is also worth using. However, sometimes it is worth using methods that are used when influencing problem employees (which the boss is also). You can find out what the leader is not good at. Acquire this knowledge, and when communicating on such topics, make it clear that you are stronger in this area. Give him a shoulder. However, there is another danger lurking here - the problem of leadership. The boss is entitled to it according to his staff. And by showing your competence, you can undermine his authority. This could lead to even greater confrontation.
What to do?
- know the enemy by sight. The more information you have, the easier it will be for you to understand how to behave in a given situation.
- be truly competent, this is already a great reason for respect from the boss.
- tune in to a positive wave. Yes, you can do your best. But if you can’t overcome the negative attitude, and you can’t tolerate it, then dismissal is not a collapse.

What to do?

In any case, it is worth communicating with your own superiors more often. Let your manager be more aware of your successes. When talking about problems, suggest ways to solve them. Start your sentence with the word “yes.” Then the boss will subconsciously assume that you agree with him. Repeat or paraphrase his words (for example, the boss says that suppliers are not working well. You answer, yes, there are problems with suppliers. And this is connected with such and such. What do you think, if we do such and such -will this improve the situation?). Here two birds are “killed” with one stone: you push the boss to a certain decision, and he remains confident that last word follow him anyway, and seek feedback. Show your interest in resolving the controversial issue.
The boss needs to know that you are reliable. State your position clearly. He should know what to expect from you. Listen carefully to your manager and ask him again. Try to understand the boss's mood.
Also, any boss will appreciate serious attitude to work, respect for oneself. Try to find positive qualities in a leader.

Tricks

Small tricks: if the boss likes to shout and swear, and is generally evil, try to understand what he is missing. For example, he wants to become an even bigger boss. Mentally, with all your heart and with all your love, sincerely wish him the fulfillment of his dreams, imagine him in a high position, how everyone bows to him, what privileges he will receive. The main thing is to do it sincerely! Try it for fun - you will be surprised at the results.
Also, when the conflict is in full swing, you can imagine that you are enclosed in a cube in which outer surface made of mirror glass. The interlocutor, shouting at you, gets his insults back. The main thing here is not to show that you are defending yourself. It’s good in a situation where the interlocutor does not want to listen to any sensible arguments. Try this too.

Relationships with superiors are a painful topic for many subordinates. There is no way to please him - he constantly shouts, reprimands, and makes comments. Of course, situations are different and in some cases relationships take on a friendly character from the first days of work. But what to do if in your case not everything is so rosy and disagreements arise every day? Step by step conquer the strict character of your boss.

Ten steps to a good relationship with your boss

These ten steps will help you understand what you are doing wrong and find an approach to the harshest boss. After all, your boss is also a person and he has his own weaknesses.

Step one. Find a reason to respect

Everyone will agree that showing respect when there is none is hypocrisy at best. This method is contrary to the moral principles of many people. So what to do? Just think, is your boss really not worthy of respect? For what merit then was he put in charge of the organization? Perhaps he a real professional or he has excellent business qualities. Analyze everything you saw and heard during your work. There will definitely be a reason for respect. And it’s much easier to get along with a person you really respect.

Step two. Meet expectations

Perhaps the whole problem is that you don't live up to your boss's expectations? Listen to his demands, think about why you most often fell under the hot hand. Start looking after yourself - improve your professionalism, never let your superiors down by delaying reports or not fulfilling your direct responsibilities, always come to work on time, keep your lunch break. The boss will definitely put a plus sign in his notebook for such an employee.

Step three. Present the news correctly

Your boss should only receive good news from you, so stick to simple rule– even the worst news should be presented as neutral. And if it’s really good, then how great it is. If your boss associates you with receiving good news, then he will remember you as an excellent employee.

Step four. Get involved in social activities

Do not limit yourself to work responsibilities - actively participate in the life of the company. Volunteer to carry out actions, express your thoughts on improving the quality of work, go to meetings and corporate meetings. Whenever possible, set your boss as an example to others, pointing out his professionalism. Your vigorous activity will not go unnoticed.

Step five. A little flattery

If your boss managed to pull off a profitable deal or launch new project, then be sure to pay attention to this and do not fail to say a few words of praise. There is no need for open flattery or praise of your boss's qualities - this will sound as if you are sucking up to him. A few words spoken in a kind, calm tone will be enough. The boss is also a person and any praise is pleasant to him.

Step six. Don't spread gossip

Never discuss your boss with your colleagues. And if this happens, then say only good things about him, refuting all the ridiculous rumors. There are no secrets in a team - every bad word you say about your boss will definitely reach his ears, and then you can forget about peace, and especially about promotion.

Step seven. Don't ignore the rules of the organization

Each organization has its own rules and procedures - never break them. For example, if you have a dress code, then it must be followed. Come to work as if it were a holiday - in an ironed suit, with an impeccable hairstyle. Behave confidently - this is an additional plus for you.

Step eight. Don't burden your boss with unnecessary questions

Do not bother your boss with empty questions and personal requests during times of emergency. If something is not clear to you, then perhaps one of your more experienced colleagues than you can help you. If you need to clarify something with your boss, then catch a moment when he is in a good mood.

Step nine. Don't show that you're having a hard time

Even if you have a lot of work and you are forced to stay at work longer than expected, never show that it’s difficult for you or that something doesn’t suit you. The boss must see that you are doing a great job and showing zeal for your work. These are very valuable qualities for an employee.

Step ten. Get used to your boss

Understand that the desire to see another person in the place of your boss will not lead to anything. Since you came here to work, you don’t have to choose your boss. The only way out is to look for the merits of the one who exists.

You will think that you don’t need it and it’s easier to change jobs? Where is the guarantee that the boss will be better in another position? And by showing initiative, professionalism and zeal for work in this place, you can achieve not only the favor of your boss, but also a promotion career ladder.

FinExecutive Russia website 2019-03-18

The secret of success or how to build effective relationships with your manager

Properly built relationships with management can be an excellent support for your career advancement. It would seem that what is so difficult about this? After all, communication at work primarily depends on ourselves.

Many articles are devoted to this topic. Their authors are unanimous that you need to be competent in your field, be able to cope with assigned tasks on time and become a team player. But is it really that simple? How to work out effective strategy and learn to get around sharp corners.

Your leader is, first of all, a person with his own feelings, priorities and values. This means that in most cases, it is quite possible to find common language. What is needed for this?

5 valuable tips on how to build relationships with management

1. Look for common ground. Most likely, your boss's interests are not limited to work. Perhaps he has hobbies that are close to you. Just don't try to cheat. If the manager is an avid mushroom picker, and you can barely distinguish a fly agaric from a champignon, find another topic for dialogue.
2. Remember the chain of command. Whatever your relationship, do not forget that the last word should remain with the manager. If you are sure that your idea will benefit the company, defend your point of view with arguments. Be tactful and remain correct. Even if they answer you with a refusal, do not rush to write a letter of resignation. After all, responsibility for decisions made (or not made) always falls on the shoulders of the boss.
3. For criticism - taboo. Criticism is one of the most serious mistakes of a subordinate. Even if you have something to say, resist the temptation to engage in discussions about management behavior. After all, among the interlocutors there may be a “friend” who will soon tell the boss everything in detail. And it is unknown in what form, with what colorful turns this information will be presented.
4. Learn from experience. This is a great way to improve your professionalism. After all, it was these methods that allowed the boss to achieve success. Therefore, analyze his train of thought, his work methodology, and what technologies he prefers. It is possible that your personal productivity will soon increase significantly.
5. Calculate the development of the situation. When you receive a task to find out information or analyze the figures obtained, think about what else management might need along the way. Foresight and knowledge of information indicate your professionalism.

What to do when everything is not so smooth?

Unfortunately, in practice the situation is not always favorable. There could be many reasons for this. After all, each of us has our own character, communication experience, rhythm, and habitual techniques that we acquire at our previous place of work.

Maybe you are used to completing tasks efficiently and thoughtfully, but now you are expected to have a lightning-fast reaction and an instant report on the work done. Or the new boss seeks to control you at all stages of the task, but you are used to planning your actions on your own and only showing the final result by the specified deadline.

In any case, negative emotions unbalance and interfere with productive work. Sometimes, in order to understand the cause of disagreements and eliminate them, it is enough to analyze what situations irritate the manager, listen to his opinion and try to make adjustments to your behavior.

Observing colleagues can be helpful. If only you experience difficulties in communication, and the rest manage to find a common language with the boss, then the cause of the troubles definitely lies with you. Ask if someone in the team has already been in your place. Then it makes sense to talk to this person and benefit from his experience.

If, despite your best efforts, productive cooperation cannot be achieved, try to find an appropriate moment to talk with your manager alone. Correctly ask what actions of yours he considers incorrect. Ask his opinion on how to fix it and take the answer into account. After all, your future career may depend on how well you listen.

In this situation, it is important to be able to choose the right time to talk and manner of behavior. When an inspection is on the horizon or deadlines for submitting an important report are approaching, management is unlikely to be in the mood for dialogue. And the question “Why are you yelling at me?” will not help establish contact. It is much more constructive to formulate the phrase like this: “What is my mistake?” At the same time, demonstrate a desire to make efforts to correct it.

Remember - a frank conversation with your boss has saved more than one career.

Irina Davydova

Reading time: 7 minutes

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Relationships with your boss are always a separate issue: for some, they develop immediately and proceed in a friendly manner, while others, to put it mildly, do not like their immediate boss or, even worse, simply hate him. Different characters, aspirations, achievements, goals, likes - any of the characteristics can cause discord.

So, how to improve your relationship with your boss? Read the site 10 the best ways improve relations with the boss .

• Respect
  Agree that it is not always fair that he was appointed manager, but you have been working as a specialist in the same place for 10 years and perhaps he is younger than you. Then why are you still sitting and not expressing your preferences and wishes? Perhaps you need to take more initiative?
  Of course, every company is different. But let's try to look at this issue from the other side.
  First, analyze why this particular person became your boss. Maybe he speaks loudly or carries himself confidently? Maybe his appearance is conducive to communication or he is a professional in his field? Consider all possible edges and find positive aspects his leadership. Psychologists remind us that leaders are people with their own weaknesses and human life. Think about what your boss is interested in, what hobbies he has, who he communicates with. Respect is your first step to success!
• Expectations
  Evaluate what the boss expects from you?

  

• Tell your boss only good news
  If you constantly approach him with a problem, he begins to consider you as one of his big problems. Disguise bad news as neutral, and present neutral as very good. Let your boss remember you as a bearer of good news, and then career advancement and increased bonuses are guaranteed.
• Be visible
  Actively participate in meetings, gatherings, and trainings. Have your say. Suggest ideas, analyze working moments out loud, offer options and ideas - your train of thought will set you apart from your colleagues, even if they understand more than you, but are silent. Actively show off your work, copying your boss in uncertain situations or when you need to emphasize your professionalism.
• Follow the dress code
  If this is accepted in the company, it is necessary to comply with the dress code, even if your profession does not involve meeting with clients.
  
  
  Often employees of various professions “forget” that they work in an office - hairstyle, manicure and dress code will make you more attractive, self-confident, and therefore reliable (don’t forget about this).
• Praise
  The boss is also a person. Praise him again if his project is a success. The main thing is not to overdo it. A simple phrase - “You did it great” will be noted in the eyes of the manager. Read also: .
• Assessment of the situation
  You shouldn’t bother your boss over trifles once again; it’s better to contact your colleague once again with a question or wait for the right moment. If there is a rush at work, wait until you sign up for vacation or sick leave.
• Don't gossip
  Do not spread gossip about your boss - someone in the team will still reveal your secret and all the words that will be said to your boss. Believe me, especially if you are a good specialist, many will want to take your place, and the manager will want to get rid of you and will promote the one who will report to him about all the changes at work.
  
  
• Don't compare
  Do not compare the new boss with the previous one, because you have already worked with the last one, got used to it, talked to him, got to know him. A new boss is always a “stranger” at first. Over time, you will get used to it and, perhaps, it will become better for you than the previous one.
• Make it easy
  Even if there is a lot of work, and you sit too long periodically, do not show that it is hard for you, that it is a burden to you. Get things done while answering the phone. Be multitasking and easy. Read also: