What is love from a scientific point of view: the chemistry of feelings. What is love from a scientific point of view? What is love from a scientific point of view
Man in many of his manifestations is an irrational being, especially when it comes to emotions and feelings: sometimes they are not so easy to justify from a logical point of view. If we talk about such a complex phenomenon as love, here the law of cause and effect completely stops working, because the state of love is too complex and multifaceted to be disassembled, as they say “brick by brick.”
Nevertheless, experts do not give up attempts to explain love passion by chemical reactions, animal instincts or, say, social laws. The following are eight statements by scientists, in which they set out their vision of love.
1. “Love is like thirst,” - Lucy Brown, a neurologist from the College of Medicine. A. Einstein, New York, NY
The experience of a lover is similar to the feeling of thirst, which can only be quenched by the presence of the object of passion. All thoughts, actions, aspirations - everything suddenly obeys the desire to be close to your lover (or beloved). Of course, everyone has their own temperament, and everyone expresses romantic feelings differently, but any person, when falling in love, experiences a state similar to euphoria, and it occurs only in the presence of the “other half.”
After studying the brain activity of several pairs of lovers using magnetic resonance imaging (MRI), we came to the conclusion that when lovers are together or think about each other, they activate areas of the brain that are also responsible for the feeling of joy from any reward or recognition, and in strength this feeling is quite comparable to thirst or hunger. We can say that falling in love is part of the reproductive mechanism inherent in us by nature itself: it contributes to the establishment of strong emotional connections between sexual partners and thus increases the chances of having children.
2. “Love is like having someone in your head,” Helen Fisher, anthropologist at Rutgers University, New Jersey
Love comes in different forms, but I think we can distinguish three main types: sexual attraction, falling in love and deep affection. My colleagues and I have been studying the functioning of the brain of lovers for a long time; one of our experiments involved 60 men and women aged 18 to 57 years, whom we examined using MRI, analyzing the main manifestations of romantic feelings.
The first thing a person begins to experience when he falls in love is a certain feeling of “specialness” and “uniqueness” of everything connected with the object of love - his (or her) clothes, car, street, whatever. The lover begins to focus on his passion in everything: he mopes when he (she) does not call and “glows” with happiness when the relationship improves.
The state of falling in love is also characterized by a rapid heartbeat, increased sweating and a physiological state that is also called “butterflies in the stomach.” This is due to an increase in the production of the hormone dopamine, which causes delight in a person, a surge of energy and encourages action - these sensations can be compared to the fact that someone who has settled right in the head constantly calls on him to run somewhere, take action, and all for the sake of the three most main words: “I love you.”
I believe that love serves for more reliable reproduction of descendants: it forces us to focus all our attention on one partner and not to be scattered among casual sexual relationships.
3. “Love as a building material,” - Daniel Krueger, psychologist at the University of Michigan, Ann Arbor, Michigan
Love is a positive experience that contributes to the establishment of stable social connections and the formation of stable relationships and, as a result, facilitates the creation of a family as a fundamental unit of society. Without it, we would more often act solely out of our own short-term selfish motives and considerations of personal gain, which would inevitably affect the situation in society.
The feelings we experience for our loved ones strengthen long-term relationships, which in turn has a positive effect on the birth of socially protected children. Love allows people to take care of their offspring until they become independent, and this, it seems to me, is its main socially significant function.
4. “Love is expressed in the persistent desire to care,” - David Givens, director of the Center for Nonverbal Studies, Spokane, Washington
First of all, love is an emotion, a feeling of affection and devotion that a person feels towards someone or something. An ardent passion may be stronger than, for example, love for family members or even one’s own children, or it can only be expressed in sexual desire.
Love originates in the same part of the brain as maternal affection, the desire to care for offspring, so I believe that it developed precisely from the maternal instinct. The fact that lovers feel the need to look after each other, help and support each other in everything confirms this.
5. “Love is sex,” Luis Garcia, professor of psychology at Rutgers University
Science knows a lot of evidence that sexuality plays a very important role in relationships. A number of studies indicate that satisfaction with intimate life directly affects, for example, overall impressions of marriage; in addition, according to the results of our experiments, a person who lives a full sex life has a greater chance of finding long-term and fruitful relationships.
Together with my colleague, Dr. Charlotte Markey, we interviewed several couples who had been living together for quite a long time - in a civil marriage or registered, it doesn’t matter. It turned out that one of the main incentives for living together was their sexual attraction to each other. Also, rich sexual experience has a positive effect on intimate life, and therefore on feelings, and if the partners have approximately the same experience, their union has every chance of being happy for many years.
6. “Love is unthinkable without respect,” - Kate Wax, psychologist, author of Relationships for Dummies
There is no love without mutual respect and trust. Lovers try to show their best side, so successful relationships always consist of honesty, loyalty, emotional support and self-sacrifice. Love gives everyone a sense of their uniqueness and makes them accept the uniqueness of the other: everyone believes that if his partner feels good with him, it is necessary to take measures so as not to destroy the fragile balance. Therefore, any loving person strives to defend the interests of his “other half” and satisfy her needs.
I believe that the opposite feeling of love is not hatred, but indifference: if you stop worrying about a person and don’t feel the need to take care of him, this indicates a loss of respect, which means there can be no talk of love.
7. “Love is a long-term relationship,” - Stephanie Ortigue, neuroscientist at Syracuse University, Syracuse, New York
Everyone knows what love is, but no one can give a clear, agreed upon definition. In my interpretation, I use the results of my psychological research and neuroimaging of the brain function of lovers. In my opinion, love is a complex positive and motivating mental state, characterized by a desire for unity with a certain person. This condition involves a number of chemical, emotional and cognitive processes.
If, when communicating with a partner, the activity of certain areas of neurons is observed, this indicates the presence of love, and we do not know any evidence that love cannot last for any length of time, but the problem is that it is influenced by too many factors, the change of which is sometimes impossible to predict . However, if we consider love as an established affectionate attitude towards someone, this definition includes such types of love as maternal and paternal love, the love of children for parents and love between sexual partners.
8. “Love as a historical constant,” Stephanie Koontz, historian at Evergreen State College, Olympia, Washington
People have been falling in love with each other throughout history, but ardent romantic feelings until relatively recently were not considered a worthy basis for a relationship, much less marriage. The majority got married in obedience to the will of their parents, who, as a rule, took into account only mercantile considerations when choosing a life partner for their son or daughter.
The situation began to change in the 19th century - love began to play a much more significant role in family relationships. People had to re-realize that they were attracted to the opposite sex and recognize that love must be at the core of any successful marriage. I believe that in our time, spouses and lovers should experience not only love passion for each other, but also friendly feelings. The combination of love and friendship will provide partners with a long, happy and fruitful relationship.
Love seems to almost every person to be a riddle, a secret, an invisible space, but this bright feeling can also be explained from a scientific point of view. Scientists are sure that the main symptoms of love include languor, love fever, causeless laughter or sadness and loss of appetite. Also, modern science has been able to prove that love can really make you sick and it can “poison” the body. These phenomena are directly related to the fact that in a state of love, special substances are released that act on the human body like a drug. Experts are confident that absolutely all processes can be considered as a kind of chemical reaction.
Love is like a drug
It has long been known that any narcotic substance causes a person to feel euphoria, groundless joy and addiction; scientists are sure that love has a similar effect. Natural hormones that create interest and fascination are called phenylethylamine. The hormone oxycin begins to be produced only after the relationship has entered the bed stage and it is most strongly associated with emotions. The most important effects of these chemicals are considered to be an indescribable feeling of euphoria. It is worth noting that love is a drug with virtually no side effects.
Butterflies in the stomach
Scientists claim that butterflies in the stomach are adrenaline, which occurs due to stress. A person begins to experience “movements” in the abdominal area when he sees the object of his adoration and an adrenaline rush occurs, which can also be felt during a parachute jump or from a diving board into a pool. Such an amazing feeling, it turns out, also lends itself to a banal explanation.
Love is intoxicating in the truest sense of the word
Reputable American researchers were able to determine that the feeling of falling in love is very similar to alcohol intoxication thanks to the love hormone oxytocin. This is proof that lovers' vision deteriorates, dizziness occurs and they can often get lost in space. This hormone also has a side effect: just like alcohol, it can cause not only euphoria, but also an attack of unreasonable aggression.
Love lives for three years
French writer Frederic Beigbeder is confident that this statement can also be explained logically and biologically. Begbeder is sure that among our ancient ancestors, three years was considered a period when the father had to take part in the life of the child and his mother. This is where the concept of “three-year maternity leave” arose. This period can also be explained by the fact that the feeling of falling in love is associated with hormones - dopamine, which are produced only in the first three years of the relationship, and then return to their normal rhythm. It is worth noting that if a child appears during this short period, the effect of the hormones does not fade and lasts up to seven years.
Married couples often have the same DNA
British psychologists have proven that it is not opposites that attract, but those people who are similar to each other based on DNA analysis. Such married couples very often live happily and rarely get divorced. Experts add that strong and trusting relationships can be created by those who have almost the same DNA.
Love is the most effective medicine
It is known that love has long been considered one of the most effective painkillers in the whole world. Scientists assure that the production of oxytocin increases significantly in those couples who often hug each other. This hormone can really relieve pain, and sometimes helps the human body completely get rid of physical suffering. It is noted that a strong psychological connection between loving people can significantly alleviate pain even at a distance.
Women love with their ears, and men with their eyes
During the main stage of intense love, representatives of the stronger sex often activate the part of the brain that is responsible for vision. And in women, the area responsible for hearing begins to actively work. That is why men in love remember what his beloved was wearing at the first rendezvous, and women remember all the promises made by men in a fit of love passion.
Unhappy love can lead to depression
Scientists say that in his suffering over unhappy love, a person goes through two mandatory stages. Initially, dopamine levels increase, which entails a period of blind rage, aggression and jealousy. At this stage, there are often desperate attempts to return the object of suffering back. This stage is short-lived and is followed by the next period - the level of dopamine produced sharply decreases, and the person begins to develop severe apathy, and then real depression.
Love is treatable
Experts have stated that love can be “cured” thanks to a special substance, serotonin, which can reduce dopamine levels, thereby killing love affection. It is noted that serotonin levels may increase after taking strong antidepressants.
Love at first sight exists
British professor Stephanie Ortigue and her colleagues conducted an experiment that showed the influence of love experiences on brain structures. The results of the study showed that absolutely all lovers had a significant increase in a special protein in their blood, the so-called nerve growth factor. Stephanie notes that it is this substance that is responsible for love at first sight. The process of the emergence of this bright feeling takes only five seconds, and therefore very often a person simply does not have time to record this moment in his memory.
: psychologists, philosophers, biologists, chemists and even psychiatrists, but so far no one can give it an exact definition. Many researchers are trying to understand what love is from a scientific point of view, but the results almost always turn out to be ambiguous, causing lengthy debates and discussions.
Biochemistry of feelings
The scientific definition of love as a chemical reaction of the body was discovered by biochemists, indicating a rather complex formula. Love from a chemical point of view is a special reaction, the exact formula of which is understandable only to specialists. They claim that the feeling arises due to the release of the substance dopamine - the hormone of joy. However, this interpretation raises many questions because:
- a chemical reaction does not differentiate between feelings such as lust, falling in love, passion - the substances released by the body are the same, but the depth of sensations is different;
- the formula is the same for creativity and love (many images are inspired by unrequited feelings);
- some researchers believe that feelings are an irrational concept and cannot be fit into chemical and mathematical formulas.
Therefore, love as a feeling cannot be explained from a chemical point of view, since by combining the elements of matter it is difficult to show all the nuances of emotions and distinguish love from other experiences similar to it. The philosophical definition of this feeling is also considered quite confusing for understanding love. Many researchers believe that love is immensity in the world of measures. However, this definition also raises many questions among those who are not familiar with philosophy.
One of the prominent psychotherapists of our time, M.E. Litvak, gives a more precise and modern formulation of love:
“Love is an active interest in the life and development of the object of love.”
This concept corresponds to recognized scientific standards, as well as the provisions of practical psychology. That is why this formulation is considered one of the most modern.
What is love from a scientific point of view in psychology
The definition given by Litvak allows us to distinguish this wonderful romantic feeling from such definitions as falling in love, sympathy and thirst for love, passionate desire and tenderness. Here is the exact decoding of the concept described by M.E. Litvak in his books.
“Interest can be passive or active. Passive – these are dreams, daydreams. It is characteristic of sympathy, a thirst for love and falling in love, although some people in this state become active and achieve the object of their sympathy. However, falling in love, unlike love, means an urgent need to be together, physical attraction and tenderness. It is selfish (wanting to be loved) and not sacrificial, unlike love. She lacks genuine care, sacrifice, and the desire to correctly assess her capabilities and contribute to the development of her love object.”
Litvak shares love not only as a concern for the well-being and development of others, but also for his own. Self-love becomes basic in such a situation. It is expressed in the formula: active interest in one’s own life and development. This means that a person takes steps to become better, grows, works on himself, and creates the conditions for a happy life. With this approach, he sees and feels the desires of his loved one, creating conditions for their implementation. And he may even give up his own desire to be with his loved one if he sees that his loved one will feel bad with him. That is why true love is not at all characterized by jealousy, aggression, or the desire to suppress someone and subordinate them to one’s desires.
Litvak writes about what beautiful love is from a scientific point of view in his books and modern literature. And, contrary to popular belief, this is not romance and passion at all. Yes, they also have their place, but the very definition of love is not in them. He emphasizes that you can only buy affection, but not a genuine deep feeling. Modern love, from a scientific point of view, is also a helping hand in a difficult situation (but not to the detriment of oneself), friendship, in which there is attraction, the desire for procreation, sexual contact, trust and tenderness.
This is precisely the opinion today held by modern specialists in practical psychology, who also work with married couples. They help resolve various family conflicts and try to lead the couple to a common solution.
And yet, not a single scientific definition of love contains a general formula that reflects dreams under the moon, a million flowers from a loved one, his tenderness and passion, as well as the smile of his beloved woman, for whose happiness he is ready to give everything. And not a single definition of what true love is from a scientific point of view can convey all the facets of this wonderful feeling.
Love from a scientific point of view
You meet the one or the one with whom you want to spend your whole life. At the same time, you are absolutely convinced that love like yours simply does not exist in the world. But, as experts say, if relationships between lovers develop differently, then the motivating feeling that couples in love create is always the same. And this feeling is regulated by factors beyond a person’s control. This can be called the chemical basis of physical attraction.
Recently, scientists discovered that humans have an organ located on the nasal septum that detects the presence of pheromones, i.e., the smell of a potential partner. Previously, scientists believed that this organ functions only in lower mammals, but not in humans.
Dogs, rats, mice, anyone - everyone has this organ. And if its functions are disrupted before puberty, then the animal stops searching for a partner, and the element of sexual desire disappears. The same can be experienced by a person with impaired functioning of this organ.
If a person sees and hears someone whom he finds attractive, his organs pick up that person's pheromones, which triggers a series of biochemical processes. This complex of stimuli can lead to the body releasing various chemicals and hormones that cause certain feelings and experiences in a person. Experiments with mammals have shown that even the anticipation of sexual activity can cause the release of various neurotransmitters in the affected areas of the brain.
In other words, the process of courtship, and then sexual intercourse, causes the release of chemicals into the brain, which allows you to experience pleasant feelings. Therefore, the individual, wanting to repeat these sensations, continues this ritual. While people have different ideas about the ideal partner, research shows that men and women generally strive to find the same qualities: kindness, intelligence, reliability and mutual love.
But there are also differences based on gender, found in a study that interviewed about 10 thousand people from 37 countries.
The conclusions are as follows: women everywhere dream of finding a man with means and social status, who is ambitious, hardworking and older in age. Men, as a rule, value only two things - external attractiveness and, mainly, young age.
Psychologists explain that such preferences reflect the process of evolution. Procreation is the basis of a man’s attraction to a young beautiful woman. The woman strives to find a man who will provide for her and her children and will not leave them.
Does all this mean that people are slaves to biological forces that are beyond their control? Scientists believe that this is not at all necessary. You cannot control the psychological process when you are attracted to someone. It is extremely difficult to manipulate or interfere with this process. But what you can control through the enormous flexibility that humans are endowed with is your actions. Our desires are incredibly complex. We look for intelligence, kindness, trust, a sense of humor, and certain personality and physical characteristics. The individual can make a choice and determine which of these desires he gives preference to.
Now be honest - do you often think about serious things, such as marital relationships? Perhaps, suddenly you realize: “something is wrong,” some changes have occurred. But which ones? If you want to test yourself, answer our questions - you and your husband. And then compare the results.
Marital relations. Test
1. If you had the opportunity to choose your life partner again, would it be him again?
A. In no case.
B. I would have to think seriously.
V. Only him.
2. Do you like meeting new people or do you prefer old friends?
A. I like old friends better.
B. I am attracted to new acquaintances and new people.
Q. Sometimes a little change won't hurt.
3. Which of you is more involved in the family?
A. My husband.
B. Naturally, I am.
Q. I don't attach any importance to my homework.
4. What is your opinion about money?
A. This is the most important question; unfortunately, there are never enough of them.
B. Their lack can also threaten good marital relationships.
V. This is not the main thing, but without them everything is not so simple.
5. How do you think your husband appreciates you?
B. More gratitude would not have hurt me.
Q. Do I appreciate him?
6. Does your husband pay attention to your appearance?
A. He will always find some flaw in me.
B. He doesn’t care what I wear or what I look like.
B. Will always show interest.
7. Are you satisfied with the way your household is being run?
A. So-so.
Q. This cannot be called a farm.
8. What is the relationship between you and your husband's parents?
A. I try to avoid them.
B. I treat them with respect.
Q. I love them.
9. Do you enjoy spending holidays with your family?
A. I can’t imagine anything else.
B. I don't care.
V. No, it's very boring.
10. Do you strive to improve and decorate your home?
A. I have other, more important concerns.
B. Yes, whenever possible.
Q. Sometimes I remember this.
Let's sum it up(see table).
21-30 points. Apparently, there is something wrong with your marriage. Apparently, life together with you is difficult and unenviable. And will your husband's (or wife's) patience ever run out?
15-20 points. In general, your family has normal relationships, even a little cool. Sometimes some tension in relationships ultimately only strengthens the family, but try not to abuse it if possible.
14 or less points. Your marriage looks unrealistically perfect. You read each other's desires and thoughts in their eyes. But... Complete perfection can become boring over time. Do you think some change in life would hurt you?
Shaw was just joking. Test
“It’s stupid to get married, and not to get married is even stupider,” famous playwright Bernard Shaw joked about marriage. Well, if you have been “in a relationship” for a long time, how strong is your union? Take turns answering the test questions with your spouse. Before you check the results, take note of who volunteered to answer first. If the husband, then he is the real head of the family, if the wife, draw conclusions:
1. Can you say that you feel calm and comfortable at home?
2. Do thoughts of divorce ever cross your mind?
A. No, never.
B. Yes, quite often.
3. Can we say that you have a friendly family?
4. If it were possible to return the past?..
A. I would choose the same person as my wife (husband).
B. I would choose another person or not marry at all.
5. Have you ever had conflicts that had serious and lasting consequences for the family (the departure of one of the spouses, etc.)?
A. Never happened.
B. Anything has happened.
6. Does it ever happen that you don’t want to come home after work?
A. Yes, often.
B. Almost never.
7. Can we say that you always agree with each other in assessing your friends?
8. How often do you have disagreements about what kind of relationship to maintain with relatives?
A. Very often.
B. Almost never.
9. Do you want to go somewhere for a long time?
A. No, I don’t want to.
B. Yes, I would like to.
10. Do you often show tenderness and affection towards your wife (husband)?
A. Almost never.
B. Quite often.
11. Does your wife (husband) often show tenderness and affection towards you?
B. Very rarely.
12. Does it happen that you get on each other’s nerves? A. Never happens.
B. Almost always.
13. How often do you disagree with each other about when and what to spend money on?
A. Very often.
B. Almost never.
14. How often are you dissatisfied with the way your wife (husband) performs her household duties?
A. This almost never happens.
B. Almost always.
15. How do you rate your marriage?
A. Unhappy.
B. Happy.
6. Do you like spending time together?
A. I like it.
B. I don’t like it.
7. How has your attitude towards your spouse changed during your married life?
A. Improved.
B. Worsened.
Now everyone add up the amount of points you earned.
0-5 points. You (your spouse) are not satisfied with your marriage. The thought of divorce has probably crossed your mind more than once (“getting married is stupid…”). If your partner scored the same number of points as you, you are doing poorly. However, there is no need to rush to the registry office. After all, a stamp in a passport is a convention. Divorce symbolically, for a while. Let one of you live with your parents, friends or acquaintances for a while. If you love each other, the result will exceed all expectations, and you will both understand a lot about yourself.
6-12 points. You are not completely satisfied with your married life. Maybe the reason for the conflicts that arise lies in one of you. Check to see if you both scored points within this bracket. For example, you have 10 points, and your wife has 15. She is happy with everything, but you suffer. And in this case, it is she who needs to understand the true reasons for your dissatisfaction, otherwise the euphoria will pass and the marriage will suffer.
13-17 points. If you are both in this “fork”, then you are happy and can do without outside advice. Good luck to you! In the end, Bernard Shaw was just joking.
Getting married is a simple matter. Test
Modern women approach the problem of marriage philosophically: “If you want to get married, don’t look for a modern man. It’s much easier to find just a man.”
It is known that advice that confirms one’s own choice is preferable, especially if it concerns a future life partner. But before you make your final choice, you need to take a closer look at your chosen one.
How to determine which man in your life will always be good for you, and which will only be torment? First you need to strive to notice everything.
If you don’t like something in the character of your chosen one, don’t even think about changing him - it will be worse for you.
We offer for analysis several of the most common types of behavior in men.
Depressed. This is more likely not a type, but a transitional state. If you decide to date a man who recently went through a divorce, broke up with another woman, or had any other troubles, then you must be prepared for the fact that at any moment he may lose his temper over a trifle.
If you like this man and you are ready to listen to his endless monologues and reasoning about what happened, there is no need to abandon him. But you don’t have to spend all your free time with him.
Business. He considers himself strong and almost omnipotent because he can book a table in a restaurant and arrange a meeting with the right people. He is self-confident and strives to dominate in everything. His approach to a woman is only one: either you accept me for who I am, or we break up. He will have the final say in everything - how to raise children, where to spend vacations, when to invite guests, etc. You can feel confident next to him, as long as his business is going well. At the first failure, he can turn into a depressed and unconfident person.
However, you may be afraid that this business person will begin to treat you as his successful “acquisition.”
Excellent student. This type strives to bring everything to perfection. If he is accidentally brought into a dating agency, he will present a whole list of qualities that his chosen one should have. He often tries to change the hairstyle, clothes, and even the tastes of the woman he meets in accordance with his tastes. Usually she should be much younger than him and as compliant as she is kind. A woman should date an Excellent Man only if she actually sees him as a model and example to follow.
The main danger, however, lies in the fact that when Pygmalion perfects his Galatea, he begins to look for a new object...
Dreamer. This is a man whose plans are loosely connected with reality. In his daily life there is always some project that falls apart even before the Dreamer begins to implement it. A dreamer is not difficult to recognize: he changes one job after another and cannot work with anyone. He dreams of changing the world, but in everyday life he is not even able to receive guests normally.
But despite all this, this is not the worst option for marriage for a woman who herself has clear goals in life and is ready to take the family into her own hands.
Single. Imagine a calm person who likes to be alone for long periods of time. Many of them are nice, friendly people, but to feel good, they need to spend as much time without you as with you. Some of them simply do not like noisy companies, they do not like empty chatter. Singles are suitable for women who are not offended by their “withdrawal” and the fact that sometimes they will have to visit without their husband. At the same time, a woman can be sure that if at this moment her husband is not with her, then he is not with another woman either.
Angry. This guy is a little crazy. He is angry at his parents, at his former boss, at his current boss. Rude to everyone. Listen to his words - is it really anyone else's fault for all his problems? He claims that all women are selfish, envious and cannot be trusted. Well, except for you, of course. This “except” makes you feel special and believe that all the bad things don’t apply to you. He loves you and thinks of you differently than he thinks of others. He's not angry with you...
Unfortunately, sooner or later you will become a victim of his anger. Psychologists have found that the Angry Man likes it when his wife objects to him in family scenes. After all, without struggle there is no winner?!
Diamond in the rough. At work he is valued, his colleagues respect him, but at the same time they make fun of him. This is a man who has achieved everything in life himself! Usually he is not yet forty, the suit looks like he slept in it, and the original color of the shoes is completely impossible to determine. He is usually looking for a woman whom he can patronize in exchange for taking care of him, or a woman with “classical” beauty who could raise him to her level and would like to receive from him the stability she needs in her life. Diamonds are very good students. They are the perfect choice for a woman who is not afraid to take risks. But you need to make sure that the diamond is not fake...
Romantic. Falls in love almost instantly. After you talk to him for a few days, you will begin to feel smarter, slimmer and more beautiful than before. Feel like you have grown wings. But, unfortunately, the Romantic is a sprinter by nature, a short-distance runner. Before you have time to look back, there’s already no trace of him. Usually he is looking for contacts with girls with whom he can have fun and talk about love until the grave.
A romantic is the most suitable option for a woman who has recently experienced a personal drama or is simply depressed. He will quickly lift her spirits and teach her to enjoy life again.
Responsible. He feels responsibility for his family and even friends on his shoulders. Clear, logical thinking allows the Responsible to move forward with almost no mistakes. Despite this, he is not boring and, avoiding unnecessary meetings and tedious evening entertainment, devotes a lot of time to sports or other healthy hobbies.
Thus, if on your life path you meet such a responsible man, don’t hesitate for a moment, grab him and get married right away!
Sacrifice. This man can charm you almost at first sight. And only after some time you will begin to notice that someone else is to blame for all his failures. He lacks a sense of gratitude and in life only remembers those who caused him trouble. Sometimes he seems so upset and in need of participation that it is simply impossible to refuse him. Then he begins to convince you and himself that sometimes you can still meet a real woman. And although these words sound like music, don’t give in!
These are some of the most common types of men. What should a woman do? She must understand who suits her best and start looking for such a person, not forgetting to look around. If a woman begins to constantly repeat that she needs a taller or richer husband, there is a danger that she may end up alone...
Are you easily vulnerable? Test
It seems to you that you are the embodiment of calm, but your loved ones claim that you are a bundle of nerves. Who is right?
You can check this with a test. Try to answer each of these questions sincerely. The answer “yes” - 2 points, “average” - 1 point, “no” - 0 points.
1. Are you easy to get excited about?
2. Do you consider yourself an impressionable person?
3. Do you do everything punctually and carefully?
4. Are you ambitious?
5. Do you get scared easily?
6. Are you satisfied with your personal life?
7. Are you too often impatient?
8. Is it easy for you to decide to buy a new thing?
9. Do you get irritated easily?
10. Do you envy anyone?
11. Are you jealous?
12. Do you feel insecure in the presence of your boss?
13. Do you think that you are indispensable at your workplace?
14. Do you lack time at work?
15. Do you have an inferiority complex?
16. Do you trust your loved ones and acquaintances?
17. Do you know how to enjoy little things?
18. Are you able to quickly forget all your worries and troubles?
19. Do you smoke more than five cigarettes a day?
20. Do you smoke more than 20 cigarettes a day?
21. Do you smoke more than 30 cigarettes a day?
22. Do you sleep well?
23. Do you feel bitter in the morning, good for nothing?
24. Do you react to changes in the weather?
25. At rest, is your heart rate 80 beats per minute?
26. Do you weigh too much?
27. Do you like movement, physical activity - running, walking?
28. Do you ever have pain in your heart?
29. Do you have bruises under your eyes?
30. Does noise annoy you?
31. Do you often have a headache?
32. Do you have stomach pain?
33. When you are nervous, do your palms sweat?
34. Do you like eggs, butter, lard?
35. Do you want something sweet from time to time?
36. Do you drive a car to work and shopping?
Now let’s check how strong our nerves are.
If you have from 1 to 6 points, then you can congratulate yourself. You are Iron Felix. I wonder how you manage not to react to anything?
From 7 to 13 points. You're still fine, but it's time to think about your nerves. If you don’t want the situation to get more complicated, protect your psyche from stress.
From 14 to 20 points. You are now depressed by some nervous situations that you find yourself in. Try to maintain as much distance as possible from people whose contact causes your heart to pound and your palms to sweat.
From 21 to 30 points. You react very strongly to stressful situations and should consult a doctor. Maybe you have a toothache and it's weakening your mental stamina? Try to walk more, rather than sit at home watching TV.
More than 31 points. The situation is catastrophic. You are more than vulnerable, and this, apparently, is the cause of all your conflicts with your loved ones at home and colleagues at work. Consider “rebuilding” your lifestyle. Rest as much as possible, but not on the sofa under a blanket, but in the fresh air with your boyfriend, who will improve your mood.
Do you know him? Test
You see him often, you like him, but are you sure that you really know him? Ask him ten questions of this test, and... you risk being surprised, and he...
1. Of these three styles of clothing, which one does he prefer in women?
A. Boyish (jeans, caps, T-shirts).
B. Feminine (modest and strict).
B. Extravagant clothes (large jewelry, the latest whims of fashion).
2. Of these three points, which one appeals to him the most?
A. His work (institute, social activities).
B. Love.
B. Male friends.
3. If they tell him about marriage, he replies:
A. “Well, well, that’s funny.”
B. “Let’s talk about something else.”
B. “I need to think about it for one day.”
4. Let's imagine that he decided to spend the evening with you.
A. He tells you the detailed program for the evening.
B. He likes to improvise and rely on chance.
Q. He asks you to come up with something.
5. What quality attracts him most in a girl?
A. Decency.
B. Common sense.
B. Coquetry.
6. Which of the shortcomings makes him angry?
A. Your tendency to be in a bad mood.
B. Tears for any reason.
Q. That you are late for a date.
7. Which of these three actresses does he like?
A. Lyudmila Gurchenko.
B. Irina Alferova.
V. Alisa Freindlich.
8. He loved one girl very much, but when it became clear that the feelings were passing and he needed to “end it”, he...
A. Doesn’t want to see or know her anymore. It's over - period.
B. Tries to sort things out with her at least once, to explain himself.
V. Says: “We can remain friends.”
9. What sport interests him most?
A. Skiing, athleticism, running.
B. Chess.
B. Tennis.
10. Which of these three actors does he give his sympathies to?
A. Mikhail Boyarsky.
B. Vyacheslav Tikhonov.
V. Igor Starygin.
Now that he has answered, look at the results together.
Solve it (in his presence).
Count how many times “your” young man leaned towards opinion A, B or C. The largest number of B, for example, corresponds to man B, etc.
So he named himself.
Man A. You may even admire yourself too much and are confident in yourself. Know that you are a little frivolous: you love a girl to obey you, and at the same time you would like it if she replaced you, so to speak, as a male friend. Choose!
Your cruelty, you know, is only superficial.
It is in your taste to behave impulsively: it is very likely for you to find yourself tomorrow in the company of people whom you have not yet met today, or to become an object of antipathy to such an extent that you will feel like you were born into this world in vain. Yes, you are charming and you know it! Try not to play too hard on this: you risk running into serious disappointment.
Muzhina B. Your sense of adventure and cheerful disposition, your shyness and collectedness suggest that you are both very sensitive and stern. You are not far from the ideal of girls, especially young ones. You do not tolerate noise and fuss, but at the same time you are able to show genuine tenderness. I wish there was less nervousness!.. Think about it. There are many other people around you and they are looking at you.
Man V. You have problems, that's for sure. When will you finally assert yourself and feel confident?
Think about this: you are an ideal confidant for a woman, but as a rule, they are rarely attracted to such people. Women are much more demanding than you think. You are not without charm, but you clearly lack mystery. But girls love secrets so much... And then, try to be less talkative. And at least sometimes listen to what they tell you, and most importantly, talk less yourself.
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9 scientific facts about love.
Classmates
Love seems to us to be a secret, a riddle, a boundless space, however, this feeling can be explained from a scientific point of view. Let's try to figure it out!
Love affects the body like a drug
It has long been known that drugs, in addition to addiction, cause a person to feel euphoria and groundless joy, provoking a feeling similar to floating in the air. Surprisingly, love, judging by scientific research, has an almost identical effect.
Once you fall in love, your body begins to produce chemicals such as norepinephrine, dopamine, adrenaline and oxytocin at a breakneck speed.
The main effects of all these chemicals are a feeling of euphoria. Obviously, it is much better to be addicted to your other half than to be addicted to cocaine. After all, love is a drug with no side effects... practically.
Love and chocolate don't exist separately
A chemical substance under the unpronounceable name phenylethylamine is responsible for the manifestation of emotions such as sympathy and love attraction.
That is, in other words, the more of this “product” in your body, the more often you are susceptible to spontaneous hobbies. It turns out that phenylethylamine is found in abundance in chocolate, and in all kinds of sweets in general, so those with a sweet tooth, as a rule, fall in love much more often than adherents of a healthy diet.
Think about it, maybe you have problems with your personal life?
Butterflies in the stomach are adrenaline
Agree, you have often had the feeling that just by looking at your loved one, those same notorious butterflies begin to flutter in your stomach.
In fact, this feeling is not at all a metaphor invented by incorrigible romantics - thanks to the stress that you experience when the object of your adoration approaches, your body begins to produce adrenaline.
Yes, yes, the same one that occurs when flying with a parachute or jumping from a springboard into a pool. This is the explanation for the “movement” in the abdominal area. An amazing feeling, isn't it? Even if the explanation seems too banal to him.
Your pupils dilate when you look at your love object
Scientists have proven that when we look at a person we like, our pupils dilate, as if from alcohol or... severe pain. The size of the pupils can reach 4 times the normal size!
It turns out that such a dark and languid look causes a very real, physical addiction in another person.
Spouses often have the same DNA
Do opposites attract? But no! American scientists have proven that exactly similar people are attracted, at least according to DNA analysis.
So now, when someone tries to tell you that two lovers are meeting thanks to fate or fate, don’t listen! Experts say: as a rule, couples are created by those who have similar DNA. And no opposites!
Love is the most effective painkiller
Surprisingly, love is considered one of the best painkillers in the world. Couples who constantly hug each other experience a significant increase in oxytocin in the body, which helps the body relieve pain, and sometimes can completely relieve, for example, headaches.
By the way, if the psychological connection between two loving people is truly strong, a bright feeling can alleviate suffering even at a distance.
Love is intoxicating in the truest sense of the word.
British scientists do not lag behind American ones and, in turn, have found evidence that falling in love is similar to alcohol intoxication. All this thanks to oxytocin - the love hormone.
It is he who makes us get lost in space, causes dizziness and impairs vision. The trouble is, just like alcohol, oxytocin can not only cause a feeling of euphoria, but also provoke unreasonable aggression.
There is a disease that prevents romantic love
We know well that there are a lot of factors that can affect our libido and deprive us of the opportunity to experience pleasure from sexual intercourse.
But did you know that there is a kind of disease that prevents us from falling in love? The disease is called hypopituitarism, in which the body is unable to produce a certain type of hormones responsible for the mood for love.
One of the dramatic results of this rare disease can be the inability to experience the full range of sensations associated with falling in love.
Alas, a cure for the disease of unromanticism has not yet been found, but there is a whole range of drugs that can normalize the level of hormones in the body.
Love has a lot in common with obsessive-compulsive disorder
